The Anti-Austen

I'm just going to go ahead and say a little something that might be a little taboo for some of our readers. So read at your own risk.

I would really like to make out with someone right now...

Ok. Now before you get offended, I'm just sayin' it. I won't go out and actually do it. I made a promise to myself a long time ago to only kiss someone I'm in a relationship with. And that's been a pretty safe road so far. Only two boyfriends, and only two boys kissed.

But I'm just afraid that this frustration might build up inside and then explode into awkwardness. I.e. I will end up throwing myself at Guitar Hero if I'm not careful. I almost reached out to scratch his back several times last night. Geez, I really hope I haven't been staring hungrily at his lips....

Judge me if you must, but I know several dear friends who've been in my place as well.

It's times such as these where I'm extremely glad for the anonymity of this blog...

ciao darlings
-the Romantic

Enchanté my future friends and confidants.

I had hoped that my inaugural post would be on Saint Valentine's Day, but alas my night owl ways prevented the fulfillment of this wish. Can't this still count since I haven't gone to bed yet?

Valentine's Day has been very charming. Despite not wearing any make up and not having any secret admirers, I had a truly great day of love. I love my friends and myself, which is something to celebrate. Cookies, flowers bought for ourselves, Justin Bieber, and chocolate all topped off with An Affair to Remember banished any old tunes playing from past pity parties due to the lack of men folk.

Now on to a more formal introduction.

I am affectionately known as The Eccentric One. Sometimes it is hard to admit, but this name is always a perfect fit. Just when I think I have connected with someone, I realize that we are on completely different trains of thought, and my only destination is left field. I am not sure that my scanty experiences and opinions will resonate with all you lovely readers, but my hope is that maybe other eccentrics will see that we are not alone. As they say, everyone is crazy, some people are just better at hiding it. I rarely try to hide it anymore. We'll see how it works out or if it leads to a make out...
My dating experience adds up to only a handful of awkward nights, an almost lover of a best friend, and one man who essentially only offered me his lips. I am telling you this so you don't expect a report like this past weekend's all the time.

It was a weekend to surpass all weekends because I actually did everything I wanted to do.

Friday afternoon, I got an unexpected call from Gucci. This is a close friend from freshman year. He just got back from his mission, where he got a specially tailored white suit to match his knock-off Gucci shoes. Hence the name. Anyway, I always felt like he was the male version of me, which turns out to be much more feminine in a man--this was not all that appealing. I freaked out when I thought he maybe liked me, and then I freaked out more when my roommate started to fall in love with him. All these fears still rise up in me whenever I see him or even text him.

The call turned out better than I was expecting. Gucci's friend was doubling with a potentially overwhelmingly awkward old roommate, and wanted a wingman. As a mutual friend, with perpetually open date nights, I was called to step in.

We went to dinner and then went to the Provo Beach Resort. It may possibly be a little gem for the Provo dating scene. There is indoor surfing, need I say more? We just bowled. Which was absolutely great--I love bowling, there is something so raw and vintage in the sport. It went well for the friend, and I think it was good for me too. Nothing really happened, and because Gucci has asked me out on this kind of date, I think he is less likely to ask me out on a romantic date, and I do not have to say no (Something I can't do because, until recently, I have never really had the opportunity to. I also have guilt issues).

I also had the pleasure of attending the Peter Pan Preference Dance with The Romantic on Saturday. (That sounds like I was a creepy third-wheel to her date with Guitar Hero, but I promise I wasn't.) It was so fun and I consider it a complete success. Hopefully you want details because here they come.

I asked Reggie (to be said in a British Accent). Reggie is quickly becoming one of my favorite people. He is a boy in the ward, and we have been friends for over a year, but I am just starting to really know him. At first glance, Reggie is a simple air head with a horrendous British accent. It's worse than mine, if that is even possible. But underneath this nonchalant persona lies a smart, thoughtful, guy who is good at basically anything he tries.

I asked him by writing "Want to not grow up with me this Saturday? Preference?" on aged paper bag and wrapped the note around one of my play swords. I left it on his doorstep and ran, my heart pounding. I want to take a moment to applaud the men who court women because it takes a lot of confidence.

Literally seconds later, Reggie comes over with the sword behind his back. I rush to hide in back, but only make it the fridges. Apparently, a girl shouldn't be there when a guy comes to answer? I really don't know. Anyway, the atmosphere quickly churned into a state of painful awkwardness. My roommates kept hinting for his answer, but nothing seemed to be making sense. Eventually they just asked if he read the note. Then Reggie said he had thought he saw something on the sword with his name on it. Turned out as Reggie picked up the sword the note had fallen off the balcony to the depths of the first floor. The awkwardness--sorry to keep using this word, but it truly is the only fitting word--turned out to be funny. And I wasn't being rejected, sigh of relief.
Reggie just thought the sword meant we wanted to play, so he came over. Adorable. Just like a puppy.

The answer--when he finally figured out there was a question--was absolutely hysterical, even though it was coined and written by a dear female friend not Reggie. A pair of damp pants were set outside my door with a note that read "I Petered my Pans when you asked me...so I guess that's a yes?"

I wish Peter Pan Preference could have gone on straight 'til morning. Dancing is one of my greatest states of catharsis and it's just plain fun. I dressed as a fairy to Reggie's Peter Pan, and we both carried plastic swords. Reggie stole the night with his dance moves. He was out of control in the best way possible. At one point, he lifted me up in what is dubbed the "Simba Move." This was not only an inside joke from a true story, but also one of my favorite things ever. Nothing is better than being swept off your feet by a man.

I sincerely hope Reggie had as much fun as I did. Fun not romance was the agenda for the night, and I think that is why it went so well.

Well I hope this is the start of a very beautiful friendship. I'm not too sure about many things in my life right now, but I do know that it is all some kind of wonderful.

xoxo
-the eccentric one

I'm embracing this holiday with as much enthusiasm as I can muster.

I've already eaten copious amounts of chocolate. And tonight, I'm planning on curling up with the girls to watch An Affair to Remember. I'm reveling in the holiday and loving it.

But what about you dear reader? How are you going to celebrate?

Here are some Valentine's gems to help you along:

including a throw back post from our early days about one of the most romantic moments of my life

old wedding photos

and perhaps a night out at my favorite provo restaurant will help you to celebrate tonight

oh, and just one more thing:

xoxo
-the Romantic

There was a theory developed by Hippocrates in the 4th or 5th centuries (I can't remember exactly) that gained popularity from the 18th-early 20th centuries. This theory, more or less, stated that a woman's womb would travel throughout her body through the course of a month in search of children. As it neared her brain, she would break out into hysterical fits. Melancholic, joyous, apathetic; it could have been any mood really. This theory was just a way to explain the crazy foibles of women during the time.

We all laughed and scoffed this theory as we learned about it in class a couple of weeks ago. However, I'm beginning to think that this "wandering womb" theory holds some truth. I was an absolute crazy this last week. I kept having flashbacks to the only date I ever went on in highschool. It was horrible to say the least. I'll spare you the details, but it basically ended with my parents having spent a ton of money for me to buy a dress, tickets, and dinner, while my date spent the whole night flirting with my "best friend" at the time. I didn't like this boy, and I had only asked him because he was one of the few member boys that I knew. But I thought he should have had the courtesy to dance at least one dance with me. These old feelings came rushing back, and I convinced myself that Guitar Hero's popularity with the girls in my ward would make Saturday night a repeat of that horrid Homecoming date I had in high school. I was even getting weepy about it. I wanted to cancel then and there. My roomies said they would pour water on my head if I did.

So instead I texted my Freshman Flame, and set up something with him for Friday night instead.

Wait, what?

Yeah, I'm a crazy for sure. But you already knew that. So I had two dates set up for this weekend. Both of my own making. How's that for sticking it to the man? or men, I should say. Get it?

So the Freshman Flame and I went to a movie for my film class, had ice cream, and headed back to my place to watch a bit of the office. It was ok. Nothing special once again. We probably will hang out later this semester, but I don't know if he'll ever ask me out.

Are you ready for the low down on Saturday night? Have you been near death in anticipation for the details as much as my mother has?

Well, I had a blast.

There were more than 20 people in our group. We were all decked out in fairy, lost boy, and pirate attire. I threw a fairy costume together at the last minute, and I'm proud to say I looked quite whimsical. The night was full of pizza, dancing, and crow calls. The only bump in the road was when the fire alarm went off and we were all stuck outside for a good 20 minutes. Oh, and the time when Guitar Hero went to the bathroom right before a slow song started, so another guy in our group tried to slow dance with me and his date. Well, that was more funny than anything else.

I was a little worried for the doorstep scene. Was I supposed to take him to his door, or he to mine? This Preference stuff is confusing. He walked me to mine. And the night ended with a hug and a see you tomorrow. It was good. He's definitely someone I'd like to get to know better. But I'm not sure anything will really happen. We're very different in many ways.

Don't fret though, dear reader. I'll keep you posted.
Happy Valentine's Eve

xoxo
-the Romantic

While we wish the Virgin the most happiest of felicitations on her engagement, we regret the loss of her dating wisdom on this forum.

And so to make up for the loss, we will have new contributors joining our staff of ladies-in-writing.

(Insert the blaring trumpets here)
I would like to introduce you to the Matchmaker and the Eccentric One.

Both are dear friends, and have their own slew of bizarre dating stories here in the bubble. So please welcome them dear reader. Love them as you have loved me. (it is almost valentine's day after all)

xoxo
-the Romantic

But I just thought this was really funny.

xoxo
-the Romantic

She also said she would give him a kiss if he liked, but Peter did not know what she meant, and he held out his hand expectantly.

"Surely you know what a kiss is?" she asked, aghast.

"I shall know when you give it to me," he replied stiffly, and not to hurt his feeling she gave him a thimble.

There was no need to fear. He said yes! By giving me a thimble... (I'm going to pause for you to squeal here)

Happy Wednesday

xoxo
-the Romantic

I've never asked a boy to preference.

But I did last night.

The plan was to just go to his apartment, and say "Yo! You, me, Preference... ?" I was confident about this approach at first. I could totally ask Guitar Hero to Preference. We're friends. It's not weird. But my courage was beginning to wane.

And so my friends encouraged me to do something a little bit more extravagant, but less face-to-face shall we say. Which was good, because I was slowly becoming more and more manic as I put off the "asking" throughout the night. And I might have gone over to his apartment and mumbled out something like, "ummmmm, peter pan preference... go. me. you.... um yeah."

The new plan included a map of Neverland and fairy dust. My first attempt at a map failed miserably. And that's when my roomie's fiance came to the rescue and drew the map for me... (yeah, lame. i know) It ended up turning out really good though! On the map, I wrote, "Here's some fairy dust. How 'bout you and me fly to Neverland this Saturday?" I was quite proud of my cleverness.

After crumpling the paper and burning the edges, I rolled the pixie dust in the map and tied it with a string. I tiptoed slowly to his apartment, banged on the door, and ran away....

He got it.

But he hasn't responded... He'll answer back right?

xoxo
-the Romantic

I have never broken up with anyone, so this is going to be a little weird...

I suppose I should start with it's not you it's me.

And maybe I met someone else, but I'm pretty definitely sure that you're not supposed to tell someone that when you're breaking up with them. But I have met someone else, and we're engaged, so... I just don't think this is going to work out. I mean you're all about being single and rehashing awkward dates. And now I have to be all about posting pictures of sad attempts to decorate married housing and cookies that I made for hubby. Total conflict of interests. I suppose we just outgrew each other. Which happens. I shouldn't drag this on any longer...

Ta ta lovelies. It's been a lot of fun/therapeutic sharing my experiences with you.

xoxo
The Virgin

I can't believe I just broke up with a blog.

My freshman year, I had a crush on this boy. He was so mission focused that I'm pretty sure he hadn't the slightest clue that I had any inclination towards him. We parted ways at the end of Freshmen year. I was elated by the hugs I got on move out day. But that was that. And I've moved on since then. And my tastes in men have significantly changed since I was but a young 18 years.

However, we had a bit of reunion Friday night. And I'm thinking that perhaps my tastes haven't changed as much as I thought. I laughed so hard. My abs were aching by the end of the night. I tried a post-hanging out text at the end of the night. Would you like to know what I said? haha. I tried to be clever.
"Hey! Tonight was fun. Let's not wait two years to do it again. :-)"
To which he replied, "It was fun! I haven't laughed that hard in a very long time"

That's a good sign right? Could perhaps my unrequited creeper-loving crush finally be requited after two and a half years!?!? *sigh* only time will be able to tell I suppose.

In other news, I keep having these weirdly insane dreams about Guitar Hero. They usually involve us staring deeply into each others' eyes, holding hands, while confessing the most deeply romantical utterances. In the mornings, I wake up confused about my feelings. Do I love him or what? I'm wanting to bake him something... That's highly unusual for me. I don't bake for men on principle (unless we're dating of course). Besides the fact that I don't really think we're very compatible, a truck load of girls in the ward like him as well. And I'm not the type to compete. Like baking, it's against my principles.

Both flames have been rekindled. And I am at a loss! I'm hesitant to make any moves with my new found dating leper status. With men literally running away from you, it's hard to put yourself out there.

But I think my love of cuddling might outweigh any fear of rejection soon. Which could later result in a hilarious post of humiliation... So at least you guys win right?

xoxo
-the Romantic

ps. The anti-austen is about to experience some very exciting changes. Keep your eyes peeled for the announcements soon.

We all get nervous trying to put ourselves out there. I myself, have placed a well meaning ;0) in texts and facebook posts alike when grabbing an elbow seems too much... However, this is going too far.

But it provides great entertainment for the rest of us!

Enjoy!

xoxo
-the Romantic

Yesterday, Best Friend Guy told me that whether or not I get a boyfriend this semester depends on whether or not punxsutawney phil sees his shadow. Shadow: boyfriend, no shadow: no boyfriend. This seems sound logic to me.

And drum roll please!!!!!!!

No shadow!

Bummer huh?

But I will take solace in the fact that apparently, phil's predictions are only right 39% of the time ;0)

xoxo
-the Romantic

Cougar hunting perhaps?

In case you're curious, the slowest elevator on campus happens to be in the JSB. Which also happens to be where I work. Which also happens to be where a freshman was trying to hit on me this morning. He got out on the second floor, and I, on the third. As the automatic doors to the elevator slowly shut, I could see his baby face looking at me hopefully through the crack as he pitifully tried to finish the conversation he'd struck up....

I don't know if I should be flattered or insulted....

Actually, I'm gonna go with flattered!

I hope you're taking note of the irony that because I'm a BYU student, I'm a die-hard blue-bleeding cougar(even if i don't like sports that much). And I was also almost picked up by a younger man today.... oh yes, i'm a cougar through and through.

xoxo
-the Romantic

I don't know what it is about single women at BYU that makes us react so irrationally to seemingly innocuous events.

I had to watch a movie last night up on campus for class. I had tried to arrange a group to go. But most of my friends had plans already. And I knew that when I tried to ask people to go. However, it didn't help the dark self-deprecating thoughts from sneaking into the corners of my mind.

And then as I walked up the hill to campus. Alone. Cold. And in the dark. The thoughts came to my mind and I said to myself, "Better get used to this, because going to the movies alone is how it's going to be for the rest of your life."

It was irrational. It is irrational. But I couldn't shake the nagging feelings of inadequacy. Men are literally running away from me, making me feel quite the social pariah. It's pathetic more than anything thing else. I'm happy, I really am. But I have two friends waiting for proposals, and I haven't feeling the tiniest inking for anybody in a really long time. Boys here and there have caught my fancy from time to time these last few months. But there's no deep connection. No spark.

As the deep wrenching hole in my chest grew bigger, I tried not to cry. The only thing more embarrassing than going to the movies alone would be to go alone and cry before the movie had even started. I felt akin to the man in Edvard Munch's famous painting.

Instead of weeping all night, I mustered the energy from somewhere deep within to call some friends to hang out after my movie had ended. And when I went over, I found that they were all having the same feelings of doubt. And that was a comfort. We can't all be crazy. We can all have the same crazy hormones though.

Frostys were purchased. Nails were painted. Long talks were mixed with the pungent smell of acetone. And a chick flick was put in to bring peace to our over worried minds.

A summation of the wisdom learned last night in one phrase, "Pie will love you, even when boys won't."

To all my dear sisters that toil through the struggle that we call dating in hopes of finding their own Mr. Darcy, don't fear. You are amazing. And we will find someone. Eventually. Until then, let us eat pie.

xoxo
-the Romantic

Sometimes I do these absolutely ridiculous things. And I don't know why I do them, because I usually end up embarrassing myself . But nevertheless, here I am, rambling away about my latest male exploit.

So I have this dream to marry some sort of throw back German Romantic. I have no idea where this notion came from, it's just what I want. And if they actually speak German, that would be nice too. And now, lo and behold, I'm finally in a German class with RMs that speak German. Gasp! Perfect right? I figure this is my opportunity to meet a guy that speaks my language, literally and figuratively speaking.

But I am a buffoon/creeper.

Naturally, there's a boy, that I think is fairly attractive. We were put in the same research group, so I have his email and what not. Let's call him Friedrich, weil es ein starker Deutscher Namen ist. We chatted one day after class, and I knew that he was giving a presentation the next class period. So I developed this fool-proof(not really because I am foolish) plan to look really cute that day so I could tell him after class what an awesome job he did on his presentation.
The day dawned bright, and I did look really cute....

But I got to nervous and didn't talk to him. (insert forehead slap here) So on a random "Friday afternoon I've gone a little bit crazy because it's the weekend" whim, I decided to email him to tell him what a fantastic job he did on explaining Romanesque and Gothic architecture movements in the Holy Roman Empire during the middle ages (because that's such a turn on... no but really it is, I'm an Art History major, remember?). After I sent it, I freaked out and refused to look at my email for hours, which turned out not to matter because he didn't email me back until the next morning. And by then, I was feeling so ashamed at my creeper-ness that I refused to read what it actually said until that night.

In my raving wild lunatic mind, I thought it would say something like, "Stay away from me you creeper girl!"

Ok, so it didn't say that. All it said was thanks. Well, there was an exclamation point that went with it as well.

Later he emailed our group a question, I responded in kind. He said he'd see me on Monday.

Here comes the part where I feel like a social pariah. He came in right before class started. And I'm talking ON THE HOUR here folks. And then he left insanely fast. Not even a glance backwards at my desk which sits kitty corner from his.

This was probably the longest winded story you've ever read. And perhaps I'm reading too much into it, because I usually do in cases such as these. But I just needed to tell you dear reader, why I feel like a dating leper.

I am repelling men at this point. Quite literally, I am making them run the opposite direction from me. I made plans to be bold; plans that failed quite miserably.

I suppose that as my friends continue to pick out engagement rings and wedding colors, I'll be looking for this guy:

"Oh, hello dear sir! ... No I don't mind a bit that your nose is falling off, I find it quite appealing actually."

xoxo
-the Romantic

I'm finding settling in my marriage a more and more appealing idea lately.

For example, if I settle, I won't have to worry about pesky roomies sleeping at the oddest hours.

I won't have to fight to get into the shower in the morning.

I can make my hubby take out the trash, and I will do the dishes... It's the perfect agreement.

The pressure to look attractive everyday will be less.

So maybe he will be old. Maybe he will be a little homely...

But at this point, I really don't care anymore.

I'm on the search to find a man as desperate as I am...

I know you thought marriage to an older man would be a sacrifice dear Goya, but the above illustrated situation is looking quite appealing at this point of my college career.

xoxo
-the (today anyway) UnRomantic

I jinxed it.

Well, I suppose that's a little harsh. This was no date with Ping. Hopefully I'll never experience a date more tortuous than that. And there were some really good moments. But sadly, they were offset by the awkward moments experienced.

So the plan was to have a group date with Mr. Bale's(my date was a Christian Bale look alike, if you squint, and see him in a certain light) room mates. Ok, great! I'm all for dinner and a movie. I love both activities. So we drive to his room mate's apartment to carpool. Much to my surprise, it was just his room mate in the car. Ok, so the roomie's date probably lives in Provo right? Nope... We drove 45 minutes to the boondocks of West Valley, to pick her up. It felt like some weird Polyandry date. Not something that I would recommend to anyone else (cough cough male readers). Of course I understand that economic times are tough, but there was another couple on our date, and I just wonder why we didn't car pool with them.

Then we drove another 20 minutes to the movie theater in West Jordan. Bought tickets for a later showing of Tangled, and then went to dinner. Which was also nice. But I just felt slightly out of place because the other couples were established couples, you know, holding hands, touching thighs, arms around each other, and other things like that. Don't get me wrong, they were all incredibly nice. But I felt out of place. They all knew each other. And it's clear they have their "group" that they commonly all hang with and I had only met my date hours before. Later during dinner, my poor date's throat was swelling shut for some reason... I'm not really sure, asthma maybe. But I could tell he was a little embarrassed.

After dinner was the movie. Which was adorable just as an aside. But someone had really bad gas. And I'd like to give my date the benefit of the doubt and say that it wasn't him. But then the putrid smell returned again in the car. Yikes...

We left the movies around 11:15, and didn't get back until 12:45. I was a little grumpy and disenchanted at that point. I think dates over 5 hours just drain me. Advice from the Romantic's little book of wisdom: Keep it short and sweet. It's better to end the date on a high note, and leave the girl wanting more rather than dragging it out and letting the magic die.

There were some good aspects of the date. He knows who the Format is! And you all know by now my love of indie music right?
But, (of course there's a but) there was no spark. The lack luster chemistry, coupled with the awkward moments turned me off a little bit.

Of course, after a good night's rest, and some reflection, I realize it wasn't all that bad. And I think I would like to give it another shot, if he asks me. But if he doesn't, I won't be heart broken.

xoxo
-the Romantic

Date.
Tomorrow night...

I really want to share more details.

But I'm deathly afraid of jinxing this, because I think it will be a good one.

But I will say that I'm really excited. It's technically a blind date. But I've seen loads of pictures (Christian Bale look a like? um, yes please)...He's my best friend's cousin. And when he called me, I really liked the sound of his voice.

And that's all that I will say about that...

xoxo
-the Romantic

With a new year approaching, I have decided to make a few dating resolutions

1) Do not bemoan the fact that Best Friend Guy is getting married.

2) Stop creeper lovin' on the EQP (it probably freaks him out).

3) Take dating less seriously, and school work more seriously.

4) Be more selective in my elbow touching.

5) Stop complaining about blind dates, because if nothing else, they make great blogging material.

So I've been on a few first dates this semester, but not any second dates. And I came to the conclusion that that is totally ok with me. Sweater Guy and I dated on and off for eight months. My heart needed time to heal. And that was my reply to any inquisitor over break.

I have startling news about Guitar Hero. I think I finally admitted to myself that I might sort of kind of have a thing for him. He does make me laugh harder than anyone I've ever met. And now that I'm finally interested in him, I don't think he's interested in me anymore. Boo.

Well, we shall see how this semester goes.

xoxo
-the Romantic

I think sometimes we get caught up in the bubble and completely forget that the experience at BYU truly unlike any other.

It isn't until we are confronted with the reality of the real world that we are brought back down to earth.

Obviously I've had a personal experience with this, otherwise I wouldn't be writing this, would I?

So the story:

I'm at home for break. None of my high school friends are Mormon. Their college experiences are completely different from mine. They remind that it is not normal to date for two weeks and then get engaged. One of my friends was lamenting that she never dates. The "dating" scene at her university consists of hooking up with guys after they buy you a drink. You are either in a relationship or hooking up with guys.

Now don't get me wrong. I know that not everyone dates at BYU and I know that some people just like to hook up. I also know that while my friend's experience is not the experience of every college student, it is somewhat nice to be reminded that the world doesn't work like BYU.

So on the off chance of sounding cheesy, perhaps we shouldn't complain so much about our dates.

Wait... I'm sorry that's impractical.

Rather, perhaps we should appreciate the unique opportunity that the Bubble has given us, and while we complain we should also enjoy laughing at the ridiculous predicament that we have placed ourselves in by attending BYU.

Kisses lovelies,

The Virgin

That just might be a record. Home for a little over 24 hours, and I've already had my first "I have a friend I want you to meet" chat, and a marriage lecture....

xoxo
-the Romantic

Creeper Loving: verb 1. To love someone in an unrequited stalker-like manner

example: I creeper love my my home teacher.

Awhile ago, some friends and I coined the term creeper love. It's a little bit more than a crush, but not the "feelings" stage. You know this person is not really your type, and things probably wouldn't work out. So you love them from afar. And even find yourself staring at them during the ward Christmas party..... awkward....

I creeper love this guys' apartment in the ward. I know I'm not really compatible with any of them. But I find myself in fits of giggles whenever I'm around them. And yeah, I've definitely been touching their elbows....

What will I ever do with myself?

xoxo
-the Romantic

And so it begins, another holiday season with constant reminders of my singularity of person.

Last night, I went to a festive holiday sweater party. The invitation didn't stipulate that it would be a couple's party. But a couple's party it turned out to be. I stood awkwardly by the chips and dip as everyone speculated over the upcoming nuptials of the couples in attendance. It went like this, "Marriage blah blah blah. Dates, blah blah blah. Honeymoon. More babbling here."
What could I have added to the conversation? Nothing on marriage certainly. So instead I piped up with a "Hey, I'm not getting married. But I am getting published."That's right. I stuck it to those couples in their matching holiday sweaters. Just because I'm single, doesn't mean I don't have exciting news too. Right?

But this encounter led me to a frightening realization. I will soon be returning to the land of my fore fathers (and by that, I just mean back home to CA). And soon the questions will come in torrents: Are you dating anyone? Got any special friends back at the Y? SOOOO, who is he? wink wink, nudge nudge.
The bloody inquisition of Christmas break 2010 is about to begin. But rather than Roman Catholic Priests drowning me in Holy Water, I'll be facing the mustached elderly women of my home ward Relief Society, torturing me with blind dates and their nephew/grandson/some obscure relative's phone number . Take your cover girls. It might be a long two weeks.

"No! NO! Sister Smith, please, I promise I'll look up Nephi as soon as I get back."

xoxo
-the Romantic

"A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment." -Jane Austen

True dat Jane, true dat.

A few posts ago, these questions were posed:
Here is a question for you ladies, how are the guys perceived who take out girls on dates just for fun? Are they considered fun but not serious? Is it harder to tell if a guy like that likes you?

I will attempt to answer these well posed questions. Please note that I will answer them from my own formed opinions after living in student wards for the past four years.

Guys who take girls on dates just for fun are usually perceived as not too serious about dating. They date for fun, they know how to date, and often their dates are creative and enjoyable. But just because they date often and sometimes have multiple dates a week, that doesn't mean they're bad guys. In fact, all the men that I can think of that date often, are usually the best guys. They follow the counsel of the Brethren to date rather than just hang out. But from a girl's perspective, I would say that it's harder to tell if a guy is interested in you if he dates often. Does a guy have any interest in you when he's also taken several of your roomies on dates? It's hard to say. For those answers, I would have to delve deep into the male psyche. And that journey would be a fearful one to undertake indeed.

As for myself, I prefer a man who doesn't date too often. I don't like feeling as though I'm prey living in the wild African deserts. (Note illustration above. I mean, really, who wants to be chased by that guy?) I place the serial dater in the same category as our female lioness. I don't think anyone wants to feel hunted, or numbered as one of many in a herd of gazelles. It's like I was telling my roomies earlier today, though I identify with many of the great heroines of literature, I mostly identify with Jo from Little Women. Give me a deep German man named Friedrich any day, who is first and foremost my friend, and we'll call it good.

xoxo
-the Romantic

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