'Tis the Season

12/12/2010 The Romantic 1 Comments

And so it begins, another holiday season with constant reminders of my singularity of person.

Last night, I went to a festive holiday sweater party. The invitation didn't stipulate that it would be a couple's party. But a couple's party it turned out to be. I stood awkwardly by the chips and dip as everyone speculated over the upcoming nuptials of the couples in attendance. It went like this, "Marriage blah blah blah. Dates, blah blah blah. Honeymoon. More babbling here."
What could I have added to the conversation? Nothing on marriage certainly. So instead I piped up with a "Hey, I'm not getting married. But I am getting published."That's right. I stuck it to those couples in their matching holiday sweaters. Just because I'm single, doesn't mean I don't have exciting news too. Right?

But this encounter led me to a frightening realization. I will soon be returning to the land of my fore fathers (and by that, I just mean back home to CA). And soon the questions will come in torrents: Are you dating anyone? Got any special friends back at the Y? SOOOO, who is he? wink wink, nudge nudge.
The bloody inquisition of Christmas break 2010 is about to begin. But rather than Roman Catholic Priests drowning me in Holy Water, I'll be facing the mustached elderly women of my home ward Relief Society, torturing me with blind dates and their nephew/grandson/some obscure relative's phone number . Take your cover girls. It might be a long two weeks.

"No! NO! Sister Smith, please, I promise I'll look up Nephi as soon as I get back."

-the Romantic

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Kyle Mathews said...

That's one huge advantage from having my parents move since high school. Nobody knows me in their new ward. I won't miss my experience from previous year's inquisitions in the slightest.