How Foolish of Me: In Which the Romantic Contracts Dating Leprosy

1/24/2011 The Romantic 0 Comments

Sometimes I do these absolutely ridiculous things. And I don't know why I do them, because I usually end up embarrassing myself . But nevertheless, here I am, rambling away about my latest male exploit.

So I have this dream to marry some sort of throw back German Romantic. I have no idea where this notion came from, it's just what I want. And if they actually speak German, that would be nice too. And now, lo and behold, I'm finally in a German class with RMs that speak German. Gasp! Perfect right? I figure this is my opportunity to meet a guy that speaks my language, literally and figuratively speaking.

But I am a buffoon/creeper.

Naturally, there's a boy, that I think is fairly attractive. We were put in the same research group, so I have his email and what not. Let's call him Friedrich, weil es ein starker Deutscher Namen ist. We chatted one day after class, and I knew that he was giving a presentation the next class period. So I developed this fool-proof(not really because I am foolish) plan to look really cute that day so I could tell him after class what an awesome job he did on his presentation.
The day dawned bright, and I did look really cute....

But I got to nervous and didn't talk to him. (insert forehead slap here) So on a random "Friday afternoon I've gone a little bit crazy because it's the weekend" whim, I decided to email him to tell him what a fantastic job he did on explaining Romanesque and Gothic architecture movements in the Holy Roman Empire during the middle ages (because that's such a turn on... no but really it is, I'm an Art History major, remember?). After I sent it, I freaked out and refused to look at my email for hours, which turned out not to matter because he didn't email me back until the next morning. And by then, I was feeling so ashamed at my creeper-ness that I refused to read what it actually said until that night.

In my raving wild lunatic mind, I thought it would say something like, "Stay away from me you creeper girl!"

Ok, so it didn't say that. All it said was thanks. Well, there was an exclamation point that went with it as well.

Later he emailed our group a question, I responded in kind. He said he'd see me on Monday.

Here comes the part where I feel like a social pariah. He came in right before class started. And I'm talking ON THE HOUR here folks. And then he left insanely fast. Not even a glance backwards at my desk which sits kitty corner from his.

This was probably the longest winded story you've ever read. And perhaps I'm reading too much into it, because I usually do in cases such as these. But I just needed to tell you dear reader, why I feel like a dating leper.

I am repelling men at this point. Quite literally, I am making them run the opposite direction from me. I made plans to be bold; plans that failed quite miserably.

I suppose that as my friends continue to pick out engagement rings and wedding colors, I'll be looking for this guy:
"Oh, hello dear sir! ... No I don't mind a bit that your nose is falling off, I find it quite appealing actually."

-the Romantic

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