Greetings from California!

5/31/2011 The Romantic 2 Comments

I know you all probably think I live this gloriously, sunny, adventurous life here in good old CA. But the the truth is, it's actually been a bit boring.

The Boy Next Door did meet me at the airport with my brothers. He's so adorable. But I could never date him. He's too much like a brother too me. I also think he's still in the "I'm afraid to talk to girls" post mission phase. As if I'm dangerous at all! (Insert sly winking face here)

I did go to a YSA dance last Friday night. I was horribly disappointed, and found myself quite longing for my boys in Provo. The boys here just seem to take everything so seriously. For example, rather than risk a girl getting the wrong idea by asking her to dance a slow song, they're just content to stand against the wall. So I didn't get asked to dance once. Neither did any of my friends. And it's not like we looked like we had leprosy or anything, (though, that has been an issue in my past).

I did take great pleasure in seeing another boy I grew up with however. This boy, the studious one, went to the same elementary school I did. And though we were separated by the invisible line that divides the upper grades from the lower grades (he being in 6th grade, me being in 3rd) I swore I was in love with him. This crush faded over time. But I still think he believes I've harbored feelings for him all these years. I don't of course! I said hi to him at the dance. He didn't recognize me at first. But then I got the "man, BYU has been good to her" look that I get so often these days.

That's about all the news I have for today folks.
Happy Memorial Day (a little late)
-the romantic

2 comments:

the room mate formally known as the good girl: a guest post

5/26/2011 The Romantic 3 Comments

Some of you may remember a story The Romantic told us a few months ago about myself, The Good Girl and the boy from work. To jog your memory a little, it was a story about post date texting and how I had never before sent one, but how it turned out to be quite successful for me because shortly thereafter he asked me on a second date. Well I would just like to give you all a little update on how things have gone with the boy from work. As The Romantic shared, the PDT went very well, and shortly after that we were dating. Now, I'm not usually one to kiss and tell, but first of all, this was really cute, and second, it makes the rest of the story so much better.

One night after work, we went back to his apartment to watch a movie, after grabbing a quick bite to eat because I hadn't eaten all day. We started the movie, and after returning to the couch after washing my hands from my meal he promptly grabbed my hand. !! I was VERY okay with this. So contently cuddling and holding hands we continued to watch the movie (can I just say that I LOVE holding hands??). The movie continues, and at one point one of the girls was wearing a fancy dress. He made some comment about how girls don't really wear dresses like that, and it turned into a conversation about prom. How exactly we got to this point I'm not sure... but nonetheless we did. So, we start talking about prom and the conversation continues something like this:

Boy from work: I never went to my senior prom.
Me: Me either, but I don't feel bad for you.
Boy from work: Because I'm a boy?
Me: Because you're a boy.
Boy from work: I really wanted to ask this one girl that I had a crush on, but I was too scared.
Me: You should have asked her! I bet she would have loved to go with you!
Boy from work: I did find out later that she liked me...
Me: See?? You should have done it!
Boy from work: I was pretty shy back then, I didn't really know how to talk to people - especially girls.
Me: Well you still should have done it. Girls like to be asked out! (here I make some face or gesture to myself meaning "hello! Prime example right here!")
Boy from work: Well... that's why I don't hesitate any more.

And then he kissed me.

So cute, right?? Well I thought it was... of course when you're dating someone, you sort of think everything they do is cute.
(please tell me that's not just me)

So time went on, and the Boy from work and I dated for about a month. A few weeks before the end of the semester we broke up because I would be leaving for the summer and we didn't want to do the long distance thing. As the semester is ending and I find myself at my last day of work, I made my goodbyes to my co-workers. But being the easily attached girl that I am, I did not really want to leave him behind or completely give him up (even though I KNEW I couldn't marry him. Why do we do these things to ourselves?? Really though. Why was I holding on to a boy that I knew wasn't right for me? Am I really just that big of a sucker for affection that I wanted it back? Even if I knew things would never go any farther with him? yes. If we're being honest that's exactly what it was. I didn't want HIM back - I just wanted his arm around me when we walked up the stairs to my apartment. I wanted my hand in his as we walked through the parking lot. I wanted his sweet kiss as he opened the car door for me before I got in. I knew he wasn't right for me, but he was good to me and the affection was GREAT to tell the truth, that I didn't want to let him go because it would mean being without all that until who knew when.) I saved my goodbye to him for last, hoping for some last desperate sign of SOMETHING. I don't even know what I was expecting. Maybe just one last kiss before I took off for the next four months? Some sign that he still cared? (yes I realize that would only make it harder to get over him - or rather the new lack of affection that would define my life for the next little while, but we girls aren't always rational...)

I was sorely disappointed.

We had managed to remain pretty good friends after we broke up and luckily work had never been awkward, but there was something different about this goodbye. It really was the first awkward time I can think of with him. Perhaps it was just because he could tell that I was still attached to him and holding and out for something and he was over me? Maybe he really didn't want to say goodbye to me either because he still liked me and just didn't know how to act? (in my defense - when we were breaking up, he made it clear that it wasn't because he didn't like me anymore, it was just because I was leaving, and that he would like to see where we were when I got back in the fall and maybe try things again). Whatever the reason was, something was different and I was disappointed by the awkwardness that was there because it had never been that way before. But I needed to get over him, right? So I left with an awkward side hug and tried not to be disappointed by my unmet expectation for who knows what.

So remember back to our first kiss? When he said he no longer hesitates? Three weeks later he was engaged to someone else.

Yep. No more hesitation for the Boy from work.

Cheerio!
The Good Girl

3 comments:

"It's been many years since I had such an exemplary vegetable"

5/25/2011 The Romantic 0 Comments

I apologize for my late report about my date with Mr. Collins last Saturday. It's been a busy week.

Do you remember the beautiful brief respite we had from the rain last Saturday afternoon? Well, I decided to go longboarding to enjoy the sunshine. Which isn't really a part of the story of my date at all, except that I crashed my longboard in the most horribly epic way (ok, I'm being a little dramatic, but it hurt pretty badly) so my poor limbs especially didn't want to go on a date when 6:00 rolled around.

But I mustered up a smile from deep within my injured body as I walked with Mr. Collins to the creamery.

The date itself wasn't too bad. Mr. Collins said a few oddities.

As we were waiting for our cones, he told me that whenever he goes to the creamery for ice cream, he usually finds a lounge in Heritage to eat it in. He then asked me if I would like to do that. WHAAAAAAT? And creep out the Freshmen? No thanks. I convinced him to just sit on the grass since it was so nice outside. I did feel like the cashier gave me a pity glance as Mr. Collins paid for our cones though.

We mostly ended up talking about EFY. I gave him advice for his upcoming sessions this summer since I was a counselor last summer.

We walk home an hour and a half later. It was odd, but mostly uneventful. I came home with all of my limbs intact.

As soon as I got home, my roomies and I quickly got ready for the ward activity and left for campus. Mr. Collins was also in attendance. About 2o minutes into the game, he tells me he has to leave.

"What? You're leaving? Why?" It's strange to leave in the middle of a Capture the Flag game on campus; wouldn't you agree?

"Oh, I have stuff," he answered.

"Stuff?" I ask.

"Yeah, I'll see you later." He then speedily walked away....

It was weird to say the least. I asked his room mate (my best guy friend in the ward) about it later.

Turns out he was leaving to go on another date!

What a Mr. Collins move. Two dates in one night. How very ambitious.

As I was discussing Mr. Collins with my room mates later, we had two questions to ask ourselves:

"Why are there so many Mr. Collins's in the world? And where in the heck can we find ourselves some Mr. Darcy's?!"

We know they have to be out there somewhere... A conundrum indeed.

In other news, I'm headed off to the beautiful land of California in the morning. Hello sunshine, goodbye rain clouds! This trip is going to be great for several reasons, one of them being I will get to see one of the boys I grew up with finally back from his mission. The Boy Next Door is adorable. He is my brother's best friend, and his sister is one of my very best friends.
Now, I think I've mentioned before, I was a bit of an odd duck in high school. I still am, but at least I don't look like an odd duck anymore. So I'm excited to finally see him in my grow up, non-awkward state. Also, he always gave the best hugs in high school, and smelled delicious to boot.

I'll be sure to keep you updated on my California adventures this next week.

Ciao bellas
-the Romantic

0 comments:

How We Got Married Because of a Blog: A Guest Post

5/23/2011 The Romantic 4 Comments


So, a couple months ago I (Shy Guy/Dear Sir) found this blog and gave a guest post about a girl I had met in my ward. Little did I know that she would find this blog and write her own post on a different blog. That post was then linked on this blog. I found it and the story goes from there. We started dating and...well, I’ll let “not-so-shy-girl” tell the story from here.

Okay, so Shy Guy is kinda bad at telling stories. His nut-shelling abilities are exceptional, but since when do people want the nut-shell’d version of things?! Yeah. Thought so.

Well,on the first day we were officially dating, I had already read the blog and had been sitting on this giant egg of information for about 48 hours. We had gone to the Festival of Colors the day before and the entire day I was psychically telling him to hold my hand and keep me close (since it was rather blustery that day if any of you attended). But he didn’t, but that might’ve been because I unwisely invited a guy friend up to alleviate the pressure for me and for Shy Guy. But it turned out the guy friend was competing for me! So that was a poor choice all-together. And the day didn’t turn out as glorious as I was hoping.

But back to the official day we started dating. There was a “break the fast” that afternoon and by that time, my blog post had been posted and linked on this blog. So I figured that I would know if Shy Guy had read the blog by seeing one of two reactions: if he was calm and stoic, then he had not read it. But if he was all flustered and blushing, then he’d read it already. So I went to the dinner and saw him sitting at a table and went to join him. He seemed calm enough so I just figured he hadn’t read it yet. Long story short, we ate and sat for a bit and then I asked if he wanted to go on a walk. And he agreed.

As we walked, I kept my hand out of my pockets, seeing if maybe he’d take his chance now. But no such luck. We chatted for a bit and then it looked like it was going to rain. So we circled back and stopped on a bridge where I decided to bring up this blog.

Me: So...I have a confession to make. I read the Anti-Austen blog.
Shy Guy: So do I.
Me: Well, then you know that I read your blog post.
Shy Guy: Well, I also have a confession to make...I read your response blog.

Neither of us remember exactly what happened after that except that he did, indeed, hold my hand and we continued walking since the rain that was there was gone suddenly. And we haven’t stopped holding hands since (literally and metaphorically).

ShyGuy back, let the nutshell ensue. We continued dating and got to know each other, we had some up times and down times. Mostly up times though. We had some important talks during that time one of which I will actually go into some detail about. Each Sunday we would take that same walk that started this relationship. On one such walk I made a comment about how I wanted to keep her forever. That was the first time that either of us had hinted about something permanent with this relationship, something that most people would call marriage. It took a couple more days of hinting from both of us before I got up the courage to actually address it. Now, understand that I hesitate to tell the next part of this story but she says I have to and that she insists that it’s cute so I will. We were sitting on her couch and I pulled out my itouch which had a picture of us on it. I showed it to her and said “I was thinking about this picture yesterday and you know what I thought? That is a girl I could spend the rest of my life with.”

Not-So-Shy girl here again. What Shy Guy fails to mention is that we named the topic of marriage Harold, since I called it the big “elephant in the room” topic. And he was adorable. But I’m okay with him not being there. And so with that cute little anecdote and a little bit of technology, we had outed our secret that we both wanted to marry one another. We started talking more and more about the things that couples need to talk about when it comes to marriage and we even went ring shopping. I pointed out a couple of rings I liked and left the rest up to him. Later on in the week, I had scheduled our temple date and so all that needed to happen was for there to be physical evidence of our intentions: the ring.

Shy Guy, being me, went the very next day to buy a ring and then proceeded at every reference that Not-So-Shy girl made to a ring to make it sound as if I really hadn’t thought much more about the subject. I had intended to call her dad before I officially proposed but she said he was busy during the week so I waited until Saturday to call him. Little did I know that her family was going to be out of town so I tried calling him a couple times and left two messages and then just hoped he would call back before our dinner that night. Well it got to be about six thirty and no call yet so I figured that I would have set up this nice dinner for nothing but just then my phone rings and it’s her dad, so I excused myself and talked with him for a little, and then came back inside and we left to dinner. Once we got there everything goes normal and we have dinner and dessert and then before we leave I fish in my pocket for the ring and slide out of my seat onto one knee and ask her if she will marry me.

(Back to me, Not-so-shy girl)-I’m pretty sure I didn’t even say yes when he asked. I said something along the lines of “oh my gosh!” and watched as he put the ring on my finger. The restaurant witnessed our tender little moment and I was giddy the rest of the night.

So,here we are. Sitting on our beloved couch at Not-So-Shy girl’s apartment, writing this blog post. The ring sits on her finger and we have our date set for August. It’s gonna be a crazy couple of months from here on out. But we couldn’t be happier.

That, our dear readers, is how we got married because of a blog.



OMGOSH! Crazy huh? Are you freaking out in the same dramatic manner I was when I found out our very own Shy Guy was getting married. We watched their love blossom right before our very eyes on our computer screens! In true Jane Austen fashion, there is a couple living happily ever after, and we here at the Anti-Austen couldn't be happier for the lovely couple. (It's worth the 3 posts in one day right?)

Happy FHE!

-The Anti-Austens

4 comments:

Working with a Deadline

5/23/2011 The Charmer 1 Comments

I am definitely interested in The Boy Downstairs.

Noting that I have less than a week to try and establish some sort of a relationship with him, I decided to invite him over for dinner yesterday. Usually, I wouldn't have done something like that so soon for fear of freaking him out (after all, we'd gone on a date just the night before). But I'm working with a deadline here!

Dinner went fabulously. My best friend/roommate totally approved of him...she came into the kitchen to grab something and he seamlessly integrated her into the conversation. Definitely gave him brownie points for that one. Apparently, he understands the age-old concept that "If you wanna be my lover, you've gotta get with my friends."

The problem has become: What now? I found out he'll actually be heading out on Friday, not Saturday. So as of today, I have four days to do...something. But I have no idea what. I guess I'm not sure what I want to happen between us. He made it very clear that he wants to get together again before he leaves. I made it clear that I felt the same way. But beyond that, I think neither one of us knows exactly what sort of a relationship we want to have. I think I'd be interested in dating him...you know, when he comes back from Europe in two months. Right now I think my recent break-up is still a little too fresh for me to jump into any new relationships. But what can I do now to make sure that he's still interested when he comes back then? I guess I'll just play it by ear and see what happens.

In other news, I walked out my front door this morning and found a little gift from one of my other admirers. I've been a bit under the weather, and Cute James left a can of soup on my doorstep. Aww. Looks like he's also trying to make it very clear to me that he's interested.

Ciao,
The Charmer

1 comments:

I've been so Blind

5/23/2011 The Eccentric One 0 Comments

It has been my experience that the truth is often more bizarre than fiction. This sums up my encounters with Mr. Collins.

Apparently, I have been throwing myself at him all semester.

Mr. Collins is a very interesting boy in our ward. He just does things differently, and this can be awkward at times. All semester I have been afraid that he likes me. I was wrong. Every time that I acted like I do with my friends--like stopping to talk to him (our conversations often involved Teletubbies references from him), or making a Birthday sign for him or talking about his unique dance skills--I was conscious to not do or say anything that he could take to mean that I like him. Instead he took everything as a hint that I like him. But my worry was unnecessary. This entire time I thought that Mr. Collins liked me, but I could never figure out why. He is into straight-laced, studious and outwardly-spiritual types--not me at all.

Turns out pity could explain why Mr. Collins asked me out on a second date in the toilet paper aisle at Smith's. The date led to ice skating, which I love, but it also led to awkward conversations and a date. I actually don't like dates. I'm not good at getting to know people or having fun with people I don't know well. This makes dates with people that I know there is no chance for connection with infinitely more difficult. Needless to say, it was a long night with Mr. Collins--especially because I was worried about leading him on all night.

There is nothing better than an unexpected, completely unpredictable twist to a story. I am so glad that one has been written into my history with Mr. Collins. He was asking me out because he thought I wanted him. This changes all the awkward conversations and moments. I can't get over how hilarious this is!

Although it seems that he may have transferred his attentions to The Romantic, Mr. Collins was still nice enough to pay me some attention at the stake dance on Friday. He's a stronger person than I am because he dared to still be my friend despite my advances. Something that I could not do when I thought he liked me. A slow song came on, and couples started forming. When I realized that I would be the last one of the group left without a partner, I started to make a plan of action. Interpretive dance alone or the classic walk-away to get a drink? Before I could make a fool of myself by dancing a solo, I felt a tap on my shoulder. Mr. Collins was there to save me. He asked me to dance.

We commented on the general atmosphere of the room and the fact that we were both wearing Converse. Then the scene melted into silence, and I tried not to smile too much. Because that dance kind of made my night. It may seem weird that I would enjoy a dance with someone who doesn't like me, but I was so relieved that Mr. Collins didn't like me. Apparently I don't study enough to be his wife. For so many months, I had stressed over what I would say if he asked me out again. I'm not good at saying no. As in I can't. But now I know that there was no need for my freak outs. As he closed his eyes for the end of the song (It seems to be his signature; he did the same thing with The Romantic), I choked back my laughter.

And so I got a pity dance from Mr. Collins. I know this wasn't really how it was, but it kind of felt like it. I love it.

xoxo
The Eccentric One

0 comments:

Success.

5/21/2011 The Charmer 4 Comments

So after much coercing, I FINALLY got The Boy Downstairs to ask me on a date.

Okay, okay. It wasn't like I forced him to ask me on a date. If he hadn't wanted to, I don't think he would have. But I was working under a time constraint--remember, his upcoming Europe trip? I had to be a little bit forward. So, I messaged him with my number. Then I may have gotten on his case when he didn't call me.

But he finally called, and tonight was our date.

And it was awesome.

The date itself wasn't anything extraordinary (no skydiving), but I had such a good time with him. It was the kind of date that makes it impossible to stop smiling afterwards. I can't remember feeling this way after a date since my first date with The Ex over a year ago.

Afterwards, he even gave me the whole, "We need to do something before I leave!"

Because on Saturday, The Boy Downstairs leaves for Europe until August.

I have one week. One week to win this boy over.


My life should be a movie.


With a contended (yet bittersweet) sigh,
The Charmer

4 comments:

The Land of Side Hugs

5/21/2011 The Romantic 3 Comments

The scene: Stake dance, Wilk Ballroom

I walk towards the water table, thirsting for a drink, when I notice Mr. Collins also getting a drink. I pretend not to see him as he's with another girl.

He approaches me anyway.

"Are you having fun?" he asks.

"Yeah. Are you?" I reply.

"Yeah. Are you still on for tomorrow night?" he shoots back.

"Yup." I say.

"Have you been looking forward to it all week?" he then asks.

Uhhhhh. No. I have not. Secretly I've been dreading it. I've also tried convincing my best guy friend in the ward to ask Mr. Collins if he can double with us (they are room mates). But to no avail. My best guy friend in the ward's dad is in town. So he's busy. And I also don't think Best Guy Friend in the ward sympathizes with my plight at all.

"Yeah!" What else should I have said? Yes is the only reply one can give to a question like that.

"Me too!!" He replies enthusiastically while embracing me in one of the most awkward side hugs of my life.

I need to stop being such a baby about this. But he seems to be one of those guys that if you show any friendliness at all to, he'll think you like him. So I'm just worried that my standoffish-ness combined with his social unawareness will lead to an interesting night.

Wish me luck!

-the Romantic

3 comments:

Need Cheering Up?

5/18/2011 The Romantic 2 Comments

It's so dreary and gray outside... I guess we can take consolation in the fact that it means the mountains will be particularly green in a couple weeks. Right?

Well just in case the thought of green mountains doesn't cheer you up, check out this adorable proposal story.

My roomies were pumping me up all yesterday to go and talk to that European Studies major that I met at FHE on Monday. And I just couldn't do it. I chickened out. I even had a really good excuse. He's selling these shoes he brought back over from the last time he was in Bulgaria. And I want a pair. Yes, I would spend 10 bucks to buy a pair of shoes just to talk to a guy. Also, they're cool shoes. But I am bound and determined to talk to him! My roomies forbade me from starting up anything causal over facebook chat. So I guess I have to do this in person... GAH. I realized I haven't really freaked out over a guy like this since Sweater Guy. As in, I think I think a guy is so unbelievably cool he will never want to talk to me in a million years. This may be good for me though, I should talk to him. Even just to be friends. I bet he has some cool stories.

However, I've found a lacking in my confidence department lately. I never heard from Egg Guy ever again. I think I must have scared him off.

Such is life right?

Happy Wednesday
-the Romantic

2 comments:

The Lingering Glance

5/17/2011 The Charmer 3 Comments

I don't know about you, but when I was in high school I loved looking at relationship "how-to" articles online. I'm almost embarrassed to admit it now, but I was obsessed with reading WikiHow and other similar sites to find out how to make boys fall in love with me.

I realize now that most of the advice was either bogus or something I could have figured out on my own. Whatever. I had fun at the time. But I have always remembered one particular piece of advice that appeared on a lot of the sites, even though I've never actually utilized it.

Have you heard of "the lingering glance?" How about "sticky eyes?" Well, here's how this tactic works.

You notice a guy across the room from you and you happen to look at him at the exact moment he also looked at you. The automatic response is to get bashful and quickly turn away when this happens. But don’t do it! Be gutsy! Look into his eyes when he catches you staring. Once you two have each other locked, flash a slight smile. Then turn your head away, but let your eyes "stick" on him. Make sure your eyes are the last part of your face to turn away. This lets him know you’re interested, and if he feels the same way, he’ll know it’s OK to come over.

So I may or may not have practiced this tactic in my room when I was 16. But I never actually used it on a guy. Until Saturday night...

...and it WORKED!

I was at a party, which was actually hosted at Mr. Potter's house, when I noticed this kid across the room looking at me. At first, I thought I'd kind of look away and pretend like I hadn't noticed, but then I thought Hmm, why not see if I can get him to come over here? No one else is talking to me. And I proceeded to try out the lingering glance. I held that eye contact. I gave him a slight smile and I pretended my eyes were as sticky as molasses as I turned my head away.

He promptly jumped up from the couch and literally crawled over people to get to me.

Ladies, I am proof that the lingering glance works.

I dare you to try it out. And let me know if it works for you.

Ta ta,

The Charmer

3 comments:

What Excellent Boiled Potatoes

5/17/2011 The Romantic 2 Comments

I've known this was coming for awhile now. I've actually been anticipating a date would come since this happened.

I've tried not to be overtly friendly. Never rude mind you. But one must be careful with boys like these, otherwise they get the wrong idea.

(I suppose I should mention here that he's thought the Eccentric One had a thing for him for a long time...She never did)

So Mr. Collins calls me last night and asks me to go out for an ice cream cone on Saturday night. So nothing too bad. Or too long. Hopefully. I did mention that I want to go to the ward activity Saturday night.

I have such a hard time with marathon dates. Even if it's with boys I like.


Speaking of boys I like, we finally had a smaller FHE last night. And the boy who gave the lesson absolutely melted my heart. European Studies major. Hollah! After he was done giving the lesson I leaned over to my roomie and whispered, "Gah! I'm such a sucker for the Thoreau types." To which she whispered back, "I know. And I was thinking the exact same thing."

I finally found out his last name, and promptly proceeded to look him up on facebook (yes, yes, I facebook stalked him). And then before I knew it, my roomie wrested my computer from my hands (while I halfheartedly attempted to stop her) and sent a friend request.

That's a start right?

xoxo
-the Romantic

2 comments:

And a Quick Update as Well

5/14/2011 The Charmer 0 Comments

I figured while I was here, I might as well update you on my progress/lack of progress with The Boy Downstairs.

So I messaged him and gave him my number. He responded and told me he'd call me tomorrow.

That was 4 days ago. He has yet to call.

Maybe you were right, Kyle. Maybe he's not actually interested in pursuing me.

Ho hum.

He's only here for 2 more weeks before his big Europe trip. I guess we'll see what happens.

I do, however, have a date today with a guy from my old ward. When he first moved into the ward during fall semester, he was actually one of the first people who caught my eye. My roommate and I affectionately referred to him as "Cute James." (Although we actually didn't, we called him "Cute [insert his name here]." But I know this boy likes to travel the Blogosphere, and I wouldn't put it past him to discover The Anti-Austen.) However, we both ended up dating other people and nothing ever happened between us. We did have quite a few good conversations near the end of the semester, though.

Oh, look at that. He's calling me right now.

He asked me, "Hey, what's up?" I wanted to say, "Oh, nothing, I'm just writing about you under a pseudonym on a dating blog." Hahahahaha. But I didn't. Obviously. :)

Anyways, he'll be here in five minutes. I'd better head out. But I suppose we can add him to the "Prospects" List. (Mr. NextDoor is on the "No offense, but never in a million years" list)

Have a lovely Saturday,
The Charmer

0 comments:

How NOT to Impress a Girl

5/14/2011 The Charmer 4 Comments

Last week I mentioned that I had 2 dates on Thursday. They went pretty well. The guys were both nice, we made good conversation, and I laughed a lot. In other words...they did most things right.
That same week, I also had another date on Saturday with a guy who, unfortunately, just did a lot of things wrong,
I mean, the kid is trying. He is. But I think he might have missed a few lectures in his "Dating 101" class.

First off, a little background. This guy was in one of my classes 2 years ago. He added me on Facebook at the time, but I really haven't talked to him since then.
Anyways, he pops up on Facebook chat a week or so ago and asks how I'm doing, what I've been up to, etc, then asks if he could get my number so that we could go out to lunch or dinner sometime. From what I remembered, he was a pretty nice guy. I wouldn't mind going out with him. So, I gave him my number.

Now, when I give a boy my number, it means I'm giving him permission to call me up or text me. Usually, guys are pretty conscientious. They realize that by giving them my number, I'm trusting that they're not going to text me every second of every day. Because even though today's technology makes it really easy to talk to people whenever you want about whatever you want, most people realize that common courtesy dictates that you shouldn't.

Not this guy.

He starts texting me all the time, and not normal things like "Hey, what are you up to?" or "I swear I just passed you on campus." He starts texting me weird questions, like "If you were half animal, what would you be?" and "If you were in Duck Tales would you rather have a duck bill or a dog nose and why?" and even "Which finger is longer, your index finger or your ring finger?"

Excuse me?

I understand that making conversation isn't a skill that comes quite as easily for some people. But...really?!

Anyways, I'll just sum up some of his other errors.

How NOT to Impress a Girl
1. Text her incessantly with strange questions and even stranger responses to her replies.
2. Pop out of your house when she's walking home from school and "make the discovery" that the two of you are practically next-door neighbors! (It was a little on the creeperish side, not gonna lie, since I have a feeling that it might have been a discovery for only one of us)
3. Show up to take her on a date and ask if she's okay with walking since you don't have a car. (Now, this actually didn't really bother me...it was a nice day, and I like walking with people. But it's still a little presumptuous to assume a girl will be okay with walking a half hour to get to dinner on your first date with her.)
4. Keep making little comments along the lines of, "Because you have personality characteristic a and I have personality characteristic b, we'd probably be a really good match." Or even better, "Since your index finger is longer than your ring finger and mine are the opposite, it means that we're really compatible."
5. Talk about how you feel "protective" of the girl because other guys keep looking at her.
6. Let her know that she's always welcome to stop by anytime since you'll probably just be sitting around playing Rock Band.
7. Text her a week later and ask, "Do you give massages?"

That last one just kills me. I got that text today and I promptly decided that this boy was definitely worthy of his own blog post.
Do I give massages? For you, Mr. NextDoor, the answer is no.

Cheerio,
The Charmer

4 comments:

A date with Jane

5/13/2011 The Romantic 3 Comments

Wednesday afternoon sneaked up on me.
I glanced up briefly at my window whilst talking to my roomie and saw Egg Guy walking around the 2nd floor of my complex, clearly lost. I ran into my room to grab a sweater, no time to even fix myself up a little bit while he called to ask me where I live again.

We went to the 3:30 showing of Jane Eyre, having most of the theater to ourselves.

But something was different. I don't know if I make him nervous. Or maybe he's just not interested any more. He seemed really distant. He didn't even lean closer to me at all during the movie.

He then dropped me off promptly after the movie was over.

One funny thing that did happen: Right as I reached for the door knob during the door step scene, Guitar Hero walked out of my apartment. Which is fine because we're friends. It would have been awkward if anyone walked out of my apartment's door. But since you all know about Guitar Hero, I thought you might appreciate that little bit.

I tried texting him later. But he didn't respond.

I feel like my mojo is off.

It's ok though, because I've started on the mission papers. Are you as excited for that as I am?


And there's lots of cute boys in my ward. Like the half-Japanese kid with the amazing brown skin. Or the lacrosse player who paints.

Have a fun weekend lovelies!
-the Romantic

3 comments:

"I don't know how-but this boy's got you nailed"

5/10/2011 The Romantic 1 Comments

The oh so true words of my dear roomie while texting me this afternoon about Egg Guy.

Do you remember how torn I was between Mr. Ute and Egg Guy? (who needs a new nick name by the way... had I realized he would play an actual role in my dating life, I would've have picked a better name. Ideas?)

Well, we've struck up a few comments back and forth on facebook the past couple of days. I mentioned something about hanging out again. Which prompted him to text my roomie to find out if I was single again. And guess what? I am.

He's taking me to see Jane Eyre tomorrow afternoon.

I HAVE BEEN ABSOLUTELY DYING TO SEE THAT MOVIE FOR MONTHS.


So, let's just do a little recap of our dates so far:
Velour-awesome, love indie rock
A viewing of Citizen Kane-when leaving the movie, I asked how he liked it, and he started drawing comparisons to Catcher in the Rye. Have I mentioned I'm a sucker for a guy who reads?
MOA exhibit opening-this is the one I had to turn down... I was really disappointed.

They say every relationship is a learning experience right? So from my last relationship, I've learned not to let things move to fast.
Normally I let the guy initiate the speed of our courtship. Mr. Ute happened to move very fast. It was all exciting, and I hadn't dated in awhile. So I just went with it. In the end, I don't think it was a mistake. He made me feel really good about myself. And I hadn't felt like that in a very long time.

This will be my third date with Egg Guy(man, what was I thinking. That is a horrible pseudonym.) I really like going out with him. The conversation always seems to flow pretty well. But I'm not going to jump into anything here.

We're going to go much much slower this time.

ciao lovelies,
-the Romantic

1 comments:

Clueless.

5/10/2011 The Charmer 5 Comments

The Boy Downstairs is being frustrating.

First off, he doesn't actually live downstairs anymore, so I don't run into him on a regular basis like I used to. I moved apartments at the end of the semester and he (sort of) moved, too. I actually think he's alternating between living in his car and bumming around friends' apartments because he's leaving in a couple of weeks to go to Europe. It's a lifestyle I don't really understand.

But despite the fact that he's homeless, he's still cute, and I'm still interested.

Unfortunately, in addition to being homeless, he is also CLUELESS.

He commented on my Facebook status the other day and said something along the lines of, "Hey, let's hang out before I leave for Europe!"

Then ask me on a date already, you buffoon!

For some reason, despite our many run-ins when he actually did live downstairs and our subsequent Facebook conversations, the Boy still hasn't asked me for my number. But he even confessed that he was interested in asking me out before the Ex and I got together. And he's still expressing interest. But he's not doing a thing about it.

So here's my question, readers...particularly those of you who are male.

Is it way too forward of me to just send him an email that says, "Hey, let's ACTUALLY do something before you leave for Europe instead of just talking about it! Here's my number. Give me a call already!!!"

(Minus the last sentence of course).

?

With a frustrated sigh about the cluelessness that sometimes characterizes boys,

The Charmer

5 comments:

I haven't been very fair.

5/07/2011 The Romantic 2 Comments

Have you heard this song? It's currently one of my very favorites. I would like to dedicate to Mr. Advice and Sweater Guy.

However, listening to this song has made me realize I've been way to harsh on Mr. Ute.
He keeps texting me.
And I keep getting annoyed.
I'm just not a texting communicator. If you want to talk to me, CALL ME.

But then I realize how attached I've been to my ex-boyfriends, even months after we broke up. Granted, I dated Mr. Advice and Sweater Guy for months, rather than two and a half weeks. And talked marriage with both of them.
But I'm going to be more sensitive I decided.

That's all.

-the Romantic

2 comments:

Boys on the Prowl

5/06/2011 The Charmer 1 Comments

I think that boys can sense when I've recently broken up with a boyfriend. I don't know if they were prowling at the edge of our relationship the whole time, just waiting for things to get rocky, or if maybe I have some sort of a scent I give off that says, I'm single! Ask me out! (You know, like pheromones. Or something)

All I know is that literally the second I'm single, boys I haven't talked to in ages start to text or Facebook chat me. I suddenly find myself with scores of voicemails from guys asking if I'm free on Friday night.

Well, I recently broke up with my boyfriend. And the men of Provo have taken note.

The first guy pounced even before The Ex and I had actually broken up. This guy, The Boy Downstairs, was actually someone I'd had a major crush on before The Ex and I got together. But, he never made a move.

Until now.

We were Facebook chatting (the whole "How did finals go?" "When are you moving out?" small talk) when I accidentally (or not so accidentally...?) mentioned that things weren't going so well with The Ex. The Boy Downstairs then decided to confess that he'd always thought about asking me out. Well, why didn't you?! When we finished chatting, he threw in a little, "Well, I hope I see you soon!"

So now, the question is... Will The Boy Downstairs muster up enough courage to ask me on a date? After all, he didn't before. I suppose we'll just have to wait and see.

But The Boy Downstairs isn't the only boy on the prowl. On Tuesday, I took my dinner break at work and found out that I had 2 new voicemails to listen to.

Fantastic! I thought. I love it when I get phone calls.

The first was from a guy in my new ward who we'll refer to as Mr. Potter, since he made reference to Harry Potter in a Facebook message he sent me. (He was reprimanding me for running off after FHE on Monday before he had a change to get my number. An excerpt from the message:
But when I turned my back for two seconds to retrieve my phone, you decided to vanish quicker than Harry Potter through the floo powder network. So...I had to resort to more extreme measures. If I could get a phone, pager, or fax number, I'll be able to better coordinate the aforementioned rendezvous.)

He was calling to invite me out to lunch. How nice of him.
Then, I listened to the second voicemail...and bam! It was another boy, asking if he could take me out to dinner!

So yesterday I had two dates. Lunch with Mr. Potter and dinner with another fine gentleman we'll call Mr. Pre-Med.

And I can promise you that things are just starting to get exciting.

Toodles,
The Charmer



1 comments:

A few items of business: In which the Romantic describes her glorious weekend, and her ex-boyfriend's sorrows among other things

5/04/2011 The Romantic 1 Comments

Great title huh?

Nervous fits gripped me all last week when I realized that I was going on a trip with a boy I've been in like with for the past year. I almost didn't go I was so nervous. But I am most sincerely glad I did. Not that anything happened. Actually, that was the one downside to the trip. Of course I wasn't expecting any ardent declaration of his affection towards me. But there was no flirtatious glances as there had been several days previous. It was quite disappointing.

I did "fall" asleep on his shoulder in the car on the way home though.

Upon returning home, he got even more distant with our apartment. Two days before, we were all best friends, and now he's being weird (for lack of a better term). My roomie even noticed it. She thinks he's building walls because he's leaving. Which I think is quite possible. And will leave any future relationship for me to fantasize about only in my dreams (which actually happened Sunday night. I dreamed Mr. Perfect was my boyfriend. I don't remember the details. Just that I was sad to wake up).

Monday night, I was standing with The Eccentric One at FHE. I apparently lost the volume control over my voice that night because I was declaring the most ridiculous things in my outside voice, not realizing who was close enough to hear. One of them being, "Ok, goal for tonight: stop staring at Mr. Perfect longingly. I'm sure he's super creeped out." She begins laughing, and as I turn around, to my utter chagrin, Mr. Perfect is standing much closer than I realized, having moved backward to catch a football he was playing with. (Insert forehead slap here) we don't think he heard.

In other news, Mr. Ute and I texted this morning. My bad.
His feelings were hurt that I went on a trip with some random guy a few days after we broke up. His feelings are valid I agree. He told me he misses me. I do care about him. But I just don't feel the same way. It's good we broke up.

There are lots of new boys in the ward. It's my favorite game to guess all the little couples that will sprout up. They should make it an inter-mural sport. I'd be in the top bracket for that.

Did you read the post from our new lady-in-writing, The Charmer? I'm very excited to have her on the staff. I've been reading her personal blog for awhile now and I have a feeling that she's going to have great stories to share.

Well, I should be working right now... Yikes. This wasn't supposed to take this long...

Have a glorious day my lovelies,
-the Romantic

1 comments:

Meet The Charmer

5/03/2011 The Charmer 2 Comments

Hello all!

I am absolutely thrilled that the Romantic asked me to come and guest-blog here at The Anti-Austen! After all, I like Jane Austen, I like BYU, and I like dating (most of the time). Thus, I think this blog and I were destined to be friends.

Anyways, I figure I'd better introduce myself. Around here, I'll be known simply as The Charmer. (I'm not going to lie, the fact that I get be a mysterious anonymous figure is SO EXCITING! I could be talking about you...and you'd NEVER KNOW!)

If you Google the definition of "charmer," you'll find that it has two definitions. The first is "A person with an attractive, engaging personality." Now, if I'm going to be completely honest, I'll confess that I don't think my personality is particularly engaging. I don't think I'm a terribly exciting person. When people ask me what I like to do for fun, I have to think really hard to come up with a good answer. I can't discuss politics with you, and I'm often the only one laughing at my jokes.

But if you were to count the number of guys who are interested in me at any point in time, you would assume I had a very attractive personality.
Maybe I'm just too hard on myself.

The second definition of "charmer" is "A person who habitually seeks to impress or manipulate others by exploiting an ability to charm."

Manipulative? Me?

I guess it's possible.
My favorite dinners are free ones, after all.

Despite the fact that I don't actually see what's so lovely about my personality, my roommates will attest to the fact that boys find me charming. As a result, I've dated quite a bit and my love life always seems to be worthy of its own soap opera. I hope you find it just as entertaining and amusing as I do...and maybe I won't be the only one laughing at my jokes anymore.

Ta ta for now,

The Charmer

2 comments: