I've been so Blind

5/23/2011 The Eccentric One 0 Comments

It has been my experience that the truth is often more bizarre than fiction. This sums up my encounters with Mr. Collins.

Apparently, I have been throwing myself at him all semester.

Mr. Collins is a very interesting boy in our ward. He just does things differently, and this can be awkward at times. All semester I have been afraid that he likes me. I was wrong. Every time that I acted like I do with my friends--like stopping to talk to him (our conversations often involved Teletubbies references from him), or making a Birthday sign for him or talking about his unique dance skills--I was conscious to not do or say anything that he could take to mean that I like him. Instead he took everything as a hint that I like him. But my worry was unnecessary. This entire time I thought that Mr. Collins liked me, but I could never figure out why. He is into straight-laced, studious and outwardly-spiritual types--not me at all.

Turns out pity could explain why Mr. Collins asked me out on a second date in the toilet paper aisle at Smith's. The date led to ice skating, which I love, but it also led to awkward conversations and a date. I actually don't like dates. I'm not good at getting to know people or having fun with people I don't know well. This makes dates with people that I know there is no chance for connection with infinitely more difficult. Needless to say, it was a long night with Mr. Collins--especially because I was worried about leading him on all night.

There is nothing better than an unexpected, completely unpredictable twist to a story. I am so glad that one has been written into my history with Mr. Collins. He was asking me out because he thought I wanted him. This changes all the awkward conversations and moments. I can't get over how hilarious this is!

Although it seems that he may have transferred his attentions to The Romantic, Mr. Collins was still nice enough to pay me some attention at the stake dance on Friday. He's a stronger person than I am because he dared to still be my friend despite my advances. Something that I could not do when I thought he liked me. A slow song came on, and couples started forming. When I realized that I would be the last one of the group left without a partner, I started to make a plan of action. Interpretive dance alone or the classic walk-away to get a drink? Before I could make a fool of myself by dancing a solo, I felt a tap on my shoulder. Mr. Collins was there to save me. He asked me to dance.

We commented on the general atmosphere of the room and the fact that we were both wearing Converse. Then the scene melted into silence, and I tried not to smile too much. Because that dance kind of made my night. It may seem weird that I would enjoy a dance with someone who doesn't like me, but I was so relieved that Mr. Collins didn't like me. Apparently I don't study enough to be his wife. For so many months, I had stressed over what I would say if he asked me out again. I'm not good at saying no. As in I can't. But now I know that there was no need for my freak outs. As he closed his eyes for the end of the song (It seems to be his signature; he did the same thing with The Romantic), I choked back my laughter.

And so I got a pity dance from Mr. Collins. I know this wasn't really how it was, but it kind of felt like it. I love it.

xoxo
The Eccentric One