Provo Marriage Market

3/14/2011 The Romantic 2 Comments

Babylonian Marriage Market 1875 Edward Long

"Once a year in each village the maidens of age to marry were collected all together into one place; while the men stood round them in a circle. Then a herald called up the damsels one by one, and offered them for sale. He began with the most beautiful. When she was sold for no small sum of money, he offered for sale the one who came next to her in beauty. All of them were sold to be wives. The richest of the Babylonians who wished to wed bid against each other for the loveliest maidens, while the humbler wife-seekers, who were indifferent about beauty, took the more homely damsels with marriage-portions."
-Herodotus Histories Book I

Oh Herodotus, who knew that so many centuries ago, the marriage practices that you describe would still be in use today. But it's worse now! No longer do I need to have beauty alone, but I have to cook, sew, and carve ice sculpture center pieces! I sit in the end of the line, awaiting my fate, feeling much like an ape with no domestic skills to speak of. My fellow sisters-in-dating await the same fate, growing more crazed by the minute. This is no exaggeration! We pull our hair out in anguish over marriage; some of us fearing we will never get married, and some of us fearing the man standing to the side, counting his money, gazing at us expectantly, just waiting for the moment when we will settle.

It's ridiculous really.... But how else are we supposed to get married around here?*

-the Romantic

*a note: you get this is satire right?

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Ryan said...

Satire or no, i will comment in defense of men anyway. some of us don't just look at a girl and think "wow, she's freakishly attractive, lets date her" some of us look at women and think "she seems like someone worth knowing, let meet her" Looks are only a second thought, and a happy bonus

anna said...

BYUSA could really benefit from an event like this.

Thanks for all the quality posts!