The Boyfriend Question

11/13/2011 The Blue Stocking 9 Comments

Last Thursday I felt like celebrating. After all Thursday is almost Friday and Friday is the weekend. So I grabbed my roommate and convinced her that instead of doing homework we needed to buy snacks.

We went to Smiths and I carefully purchased my favorite Keebler cookies, Coconut Delights {delightful really is the only way to describe them}.

As we made our way down the aisles to the register we ran into a boy from our old ward. We chatted, updating each other about our lives and then the conversation took a turn for the personal.

Boy: Who’s that boy I saw you with last week

Friend: That’s my boyfriend ha ha

Boy: That’s so exciting, look, look how excited she is.


Friend: What about your girlfriend? How’s that going.

Boy: It’s going really well ha ha, you know ha ha great…


I could feel the question coming up his throat ready to spill out of his mouth and more than anything I wanted to rip open my package of cookies and start devouring each of them two by two. With such an occupation, my mouth could hardly be expected to do anything but chew. Answering superfluous questions would clearly not be required.

Instead I sat there like a deer in the headlights.

Boy: So Blue Stocking are you dating anyone {said in a sing-song voice}

Me: nope

Friend: ha ha she dates all the time… {ahhhh, the sign of a good friend is someone who will lie for you}

Boy: Oh, so you’re dating a guy, but it’s not serious.

Me: nope...

Then we just let the awkwardness permeate about and settle around us.

Boy: So you’re playing the field ha ha *nudge nudge* nice….

Friend: ha ha ya guys are always after her

Are you witnessing the tag team confidence builder that’s going on now? Humiliating.

Me: Not really…..

Awkward laughter…..Silence.

During the brief quiet seconds, I thought back on all the decisions I had made in my life that lead me up to this precise moment.

What exactly had I done over the years to make me that pathetic girl standing in aisle 7, Smiths Provo with two happily coupled people feeling sorry for me?

I’m sure you’re reading this thinking, it’s not that bad. But it was. It just was. I can’t quite explain how out of the loop and silly I felt. Like someone forgot to invite me to the party and now they were telling me how my invitation must have gotten lost in the mail.

The only way to fix moments like this is to go home and whip out your best ‘cure’ for bad days. Mine was devouring an entire package of cookies and watching the most romantic scenes from my favorite movies.

Cures are a funny thing; for the most part they’re a superstitious reminder that the things you find joy in should be treasure and not swallowed up in small moments of…well whatever has gotten you down.

Needless to say I felt much better.


-The Blue Stocking

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Anonymous said...

"not that bad" were not the words on my mind when I read this. It was painful to read, I'm glad you had cookies. Sorry :(

Jessica said...

I HATE when people ask that question. Here's what they should do instead. After they tell you about their perfect relationship they wait for you to say something about yours and when you don't they assume you don't have one and move on to the next topic. Awkwardness avoided! P.S coconut delights are delightful :)

Heidi said...

As John Bytheway would put it, it sounds like you were bombarded by people who apparently have an "underdeveloped sense of appropriateness." My advice: attempt to be happy for them. Most of all just ignore what they said and be happy for the things you do have in life. Then, try not to be like them when you are in their shoes.

Julie said...

The only question worse is, "How's your husband doing?" When they don't know that the two of you split up a couple of weeks before the wedding was supposed to happen.


You win...

-The Blue Stocking

Something that really irks me now that I've gotten married is one guys don't take a hint. You can flash the ring, talk about your husband even, and sometimes they just don't get it. There's this guy in my religion class who will NOT leave me alone. I don't think he understands what MARRIED means--SOOO annoying. Anyway, the point of my rant is that there are always going to be people saying awkward things. They'll ask if you have a bf when you don't, ask you on a date when you do (or worse when you're engaged/married...b/c guys are oblivious to ring flashing), etc. If you've gained some pounds they'll ask if you're pregnant (really, people ask my mom if she's pregnant all the time...the worst thing is that it's usually the same person and he's quite a bit bigger than she is). Anyway, just remember that eating chocolate and cuddling up in a blanket with some hot chocolate while watching chick flicks with your top girls will heal everything--no matter what it is. :)

Like Anonymous #1, what I was thinking was not along the lines of "that's not bad", not even close. Ignorance is far from bliss, especially for those on the receiving end.

I'm glad that you had your cure, Blue Stocking. I hope you feel better soon. :)

I love cures for horrible moments! They make everything so much better! Mine includes a cold glass of milk and Famous Amos cookie dunking. That or oreos... Sorry for the awkward question, I have felt your pain recently as well with pretty much all my roommates getting in to serious relationships recently and I'm still in a pretty undating slump. But it's all good, we'll just dominate the singleness together through the Anti-Austen blog :P

If life were a fairy tale,Lovers would surely be cast in the good n lovely roles.For years, they’ve made life miserable for Daisy. But when she discovers she has a godmother, he/she determined to ask her for help. Little did Daisy expect her good to play matchmaker with her very own grandson.