“If I could but know his height, everything would become easy”

10/01/2012 The Blue Stocking 2 Comments

Dear Readers,

A lot has happened.


The truth is that life has been lackadaisical in the most delightful way possible. The TA and I have entered into the we-might-like-each-other-so-we-hang-out stage and everything else has just been pure fun.

Now on to a dilemma of not so epic proportions

Have you ever met someone while sitting and fallen head over heels in like with him just to find out you tower over him?

Let me explain.

A year ago I was at a game night with friends and there was a new guy. Said new guy was amazing and in between signs and mafia we planned a date. I thought it was sheer perfection, until he stood up. He was three inches shorter than me. Three. I think you could see the disappointment in both of our eyes.

Needless to say, we never went out. It was mutual.

Well, I don’t always learn from my mistakes, but this is one that has taught me to at least try and gauge height during introductions. So last weekend I was in a similar situation at a bonfire. While sitting on a log a guy came up and sat in the chair next to me. For the next 20 minutes we somehow managed to have a conversation that did not involve our majors. How original.

But those 20 minutes were by no means relaxing. Amid the witty chits and chats I was mentally measure him. For instance I had to consider the following things:
  • How does the log chair relationship factor in? It gives him at least 4 inches so I need to include that in my calculations.
  • He has a long torso, but I have long legs. Is his extra torso length long enough to compensate for my long legs?
  • He has long arms? What exactly does that mean!

So I measured him… for 20 minutes. The real kicker is I ended up leaving early while he remained sitting. I still don’t know the height of mystery man, but I’m wondering if you guys have any solution to this shallow predicament.

Yes, I realize this is trivial and silly and love is blind and stuff. But even if I were blind, I would love the option of tilting my head up instead of picking up my fellow for a kiss.

-The Bluestocking

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The Closer said...

Well we know that I certainly have similar struggles! Something I have learned to do is to avoid being sitting in settings when I am first meeting new guys. It doesn't help a whole lot with knowing whether they are tall, but it does at least weed out the guys that are not interested in a tall woman.

Other tips-

Sometimes the size of their feet are helpful indicators.

Finding out what sports they like to play. Basketball players tend to be taller guys.

I've also found I can work in a comment like "blah blah blah... since I'm so tall", which prompts them to ask you, and you can reciprocate more naturally.

Oh, another great one, is asking if they can grab you something- more water, some graham crackers for your s'more, your purse if it's out of reach- thing that might cause him to have to stand up.

Hope those are at least a little helpful!

Anonymous said...

How about working into the conversation, "People say I have the (Insert adjective here) drivers licence picture." Giggle, conversation, giggle, excuse to see theirs, clandestinly look at height when he shows you his. Yea I thought it was cheesy too, but as they say in Wisconsin, "Behold the power of cheese." :-)
Mr Bennett