Miss me?

6/06/2011 The Romantic 5 Comments

Well, almost back to Utah!

It rained the whole time I was here. So no beach, and no San Francisco.

All is pretty quiet on the dating front.

Except for...
Mr. Ute has been texting me a bit. And he offered to pick me up from the airport. He's so good to me, so I don't want to be mean. And I'm totally fine with being friends. I just don't want him to get the wrong idea.

This has been a grave problem for me in the past. I can't seem to balance breaking up with a boy and staying his friend. I'm highly notorious for getting back together with my ex-boyfriends. (Ok, so this was really only a huge problem with Sweater Guy, even though I did get back together with Mr. Advice before he Dear Jane'd me on my study abroad).

I've had some roomies tell me it's possible to stay friends with an ex. And then I've had other friends who've said you just gotta cut 'em out. Like cancer.

What is your opinion dear reader?

To friend or not to friend? That is the question.

-the Romantic

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Heidi said...

I think that you really just have to feel out the situation and then do what's best for both of you. I don't think there is a definitive either, or answer to that question. It just depends. Sometimes it is best just to move on and let it go, and sometimes it's possible to stay friends.

Anonymous said...

i know what you mean. i always had the problem of being to friendly with my exes, because i did want to still be friends with them, but then they always got the wrong idea. so if the boy can't take the friendliness, you just have to let them go.

Ryan said...

I would say that it very rarely works to stay close friends with someone after you break up, you are both comfortable with the other person and it's too easy to fall back into old habits

Mawn said...

I think it is possible to be friends with the former(ex) but the both of you do need some time away from each other first. Depending on the relationship more or less a year of minimal contact is ample time to readjust to the friend zone.

Visionarri said...

I am notorious for never letting friends go, whether new or old. I fall in love with people way too easily, and I don't mean in a romantic way. I just love knowing people.
This is very rarely a problem with other girls, but with guys it is a HUGE problem.
You see, if we were always just friends it works. That's it. But if they asked me out, even though I am not interested and they know it, they take my desire to stay friends as me unconsciously saying "I'm not ready yet, lets be friends and maybe the next time you see me I'll fall for you."
It's been driving me crazy.
I've never had a boyfriend, and probably a good thing too, because I can hardly imagine what this would be like if we broke up.

How do I stay just friends for real instead of adding to my ever-growing chain of unrequited lovers? Its getting hard to move around with all of them holding onto my leg. :/