Camp-out Aftermath

7/06/2014 The Blue Stocking 10 Comments

After the confusion that was the ward camp-out, things with Henry changed. It felt like someone smacked him upside the head and told him to step up. Bless that culprit. The week that followed we spent more time together and I even asked him to the stake girl ask guy dance. Granted Cali was in charge of it and basically forced me, but still I asked a guy out. It was a big deal.

Sadly he was gone that weekend so the dance didn’t happen, BUT he did say he would make it up to me with dinner and an adventure that next Friday and we spent the day hashing out the details to our coming date.  

With Henry gone that weekend, we kept in contact with witty texts throughout the day. On Sunday I had rando girls approaching me to declare they were pro Blenry. It was as if overnight we had become that ward couple that people rooted for/despised. I kinda loved it. AND maybe, just maybe, this would make Henry’s friends stop asking me out.  

I went to FHE excited for a Blenry reunion, but twas not so. Instead Henry got to know another girl. To say I was hurt is an understatement. I decided to keep calm and wait for Friday’s date to see what was going on.

But then something funny happened. And by funny I mean devastating. He didn’t take me out for our planned Friday date. He simply ignored me. No texts. No calls. Nothing.

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So I spent Friday night watching When Harry Met Sally on t.v. and downing the biggest milkshake I could find in town. At least I’m eating again? On Sunday a family obligation took me from a run in with Henry and instead left me with family members tormenting me with questions like “How’s Henry?” and "You had a date this weekend, right?".

It was definitely a low point.

Now here’s the thing, I didn’t realize you could date someone for over two months and have them ignore you. I feel ever relationship passes a point where you can’t just walk away without a word and we passed that point a month ago.

What’s a girl to do: confront him or take a hint and leave him alone?

-The Bluestocking

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Anonymous said...

Sounds like he's all talk. Don't make someone a priority, when you're just an option to them. Let him know that you have options!!

Anonymous said...

I HATE when guys walk away without a word. It says a lot about him. Trust me, just walk away. I know it sucks to think of doing that because an explanation or at least the slightest reason would be nice, but let it go. If he decides to talk to you about it, great! If not, well, go get more milkshakes. I'm sorry he's being such a moron. :(

Anonymous said...

So sorry, Bluestocking. :( You're right, he shouldn't have just starting ignoring you, but sometimes that's the way it goes. I agree with the others that the best thing you can do is walk away... But I can tell you in similar circumstances, there have been times I confronted the guy just to get closure for my own sanity, and I think that actually helped me. Do whatever you need to do to take care of yourself.

The Closer said...

The Closer here stopping by to chime in. I'm always a fan of a little bit of vulnerability. Things with Mr. Manager and I seemed like they were going ka-put until I decided that I was going to put myself out there and tell him that I liked him, and ask where his feelings stood. If I hadn't of done that we wouldn't be married today.

I had to decide if I would have always wondered what might have happened between us. So if you think you'll have no regrets just letting things live and let lie, then I say leave it. If closer is important or you think you might always wonder, sometimes risking rejection is better than not knowing.

Good luck!

The Closer said...

Oops closure* not closer on that last sentence.

Perpetually single said...

Ugh whaaat just happened? That's ridiculous. At least be mature enough to cancel or not even set up a date if he wasn't planning to follow through. And I definitely agree with the others, especially #2.

Confronting could give you closure if you've invested enough that you can't just move on. I wish I had closure from a couple guys this past year and there was much less time invested. I'm somewhat nonconfrontational in real situations so I can see just ignoring him and pretending not to care. I was at the point with one guy recently where I felt like I could talk to him at church casually until he became bffs with my roommates. So now I just don't bother. It's easier for me that way. I hope the right one for all of us involves much less drama.

I have a feeling that this isn't going to end well. :(

Sarah said...

If you had been on just a few dates and really didn't know him that well, then sure, I'd recommend that you just work through the unliking process and ignore him entirely. But he's been acting like he's into you for a while, it seems like you like him, so I would strongly recommend that you talk to him. Even if it's incredibly awkward, even if he tells you something you don't like, I think it would be a good thing. You'll get closure one way or another.

I had gone on about 5 or 6 dates with a guy once upon a time (during my single days). I wasn't sure where his head was at with things. In fact, I was worried he liked me more than I liked him. So I, stupidly, tried figuring out what the deal was over text. Anyhoo, he thought I was trying to make things official, freaked out, and stopped talking to me entirely. It was awkward and rather dumb, but it made me realize that he was definitely not the guy for me.

My recommendation would be to be straight with him and call him on planning a date with you and never contacting you to so much as cancel.

Also, people who stand you up for dates are worthless imbeciles.

Anonymous said...

Any explanation? Like a death in the family? I have to disagree with some of the people here. Sometimes there ARE legitimate reasons for not hearing from somebody.

You guys have all brought up excellent points and I feel like I do need closure. And I'm tired of guys thinking they can do whatever they want to us and we have to pretend we don't care (and this can definitely go the other way). At some point we need to set a standard for how we deserve to be treated and that may involve confrontation. Now comes the hard part, actually saying something to the boy. Wish me luck!