Something akin to an automobile accident

6/28/2012 The Romantic 5 Comments

Once again, I've gotten myself into quite the situation. And I would say that I have no idea how I got myself here, but I do. It's because I'm a nice person.
And nice people just haven't the heart to not answer text messages of poor boy clamoring for their attention. Nice people don't mention the fact that they are actually interested in several other persons at the moment, and not the poor boy clamoring for their attention. And nice people definitely say yes when the aforementioned poor boy asks them out on a date. 

But I'm getting ahead of myself. 

After the crazy efy counselor debacle of last week, I swore myself off from efy boys. They are much too flirty! Well-meaning and testimony filled though they may be, I can't handle the suave-ness of them all. 
So, when Mr. E kept popping up all over my facebook chat, I wrote it off as nothing. I had found Mr. E quite obnoxious when we worked together. He's the type of boy who pokes fun at sister missionaries; not exactly the best way to get on my good side. I was definitely NOT interested. 

We had one facebook conversation, and I remember thinking to myself, "Hey, this fellow isn't so bad... Maybe I can finally have a guy friend in California..." When he asked for my number, I simply gave it to him, eager to make a new friend. 

BUT THE TEXTING HASN'T CEASED FOR A GOOD WEEK! I'm at my wit's end! If I don't answer, he asks what I'm doing, and why I haven't answered. He'll flirt in that uncomfortable way that always makes me feel awkward and I never know quite how to respond, except with a "haha". 

So, last night, I foolishly tried a kind way to put an end to the flirting. I called everyone one I knew (an old mission companion, my old roomie, and an older brother), pleading for advice! I do want to be friends, but the incessant texting is driving me bananas
The responses were mostly vague... "errmm"s "umm"s and "well, good luck with that"s. 

I came up with a perfect plan. I would just mention casually to him that I had a friend that I think he would be perfect for, and all would be well. We could still be friends.... But I wouldn't have to worry about dating him.

This was a very very very very very very bad idea. 

He accused me of pawning him off onto someone else. Which was not my intention. I really genuinely think he'd be a fantastic match for my old pal. 
Texts messages were flying at my phone before I had a chance to open and read them. 

I felt awful. I told him I wanted to be friends. 
Because I do!!! 
But he insists that he wants to take me out on some dates. 
If you're very good at reading between the lines, you might have noticed I just had a DTR. With someone I barely know. Over. text. messaging. 

Have I mentioned that I hate text messaging? 

Well, I mentioned it to him. So he called last night. I pushed the silence button, taken aback, and at a loss for what to say. I texted him I'd call him back. 

With sweaty hands, a racing heart, and a panicked mind, I lay on my bed last night thumb poised over the call button. What was I going to say? 

To be continued.... 

-the Romantic
See above picture for how my brain/heart/soul felt after last night

You Might Also Like


Anonymous said...

This is the classic sign of a manipulative person. Run don't walk. Block the number you don't want to be friends with this guy. IMHO

Cloud said...

He seems a little sketchy to me as well. I'm one of those nice people who never want to say no as well when I'm not interested or have to keep replying. Honestly, though, it's given me a lot of heart ache then it would if I just let him know that he's nice and all but I'm not interested.

Anonymous said...

EFY guys are TROUBLE! I dated a few when I was a counselor and it ALWAYS ended in them having a makeout sesh with another random girl... leaving me thinking "I guess we were not exclusive, I thought I love you meant exclusive". I agree with comment above, RUN AWAY! Focus on the kids... seriously they are WAY more fun!

Anonymous said...

No. This is not a case of you being "nice" or "not nice". You have already been nice. His behavior now is completely inappropriate and is unacceptable. As someone said above--manipulative. You owe him nothing. Tell him his behavior is not acceptable and you do not want to be in contact any longer. Save many girls in his future this same problem! It's not being mean. It's standing up for yourself. My husband agrees that this is harassment! Seriously. Run! And don't set him up with anyone!!

Anonymous said...

I agree with first anonymous. Having dated a guy who turned out to be like that, it's pretty clear to see that he is trying to control you. I was that nice girl and it just about ruined my life. I'm still not so good at standing up for myself, but I was able to get away by refusing to respond to ANY of his texts/phone calls/etc, and even started researching how to get a restraining order. I know you want to be friends, but guys like that aren't very good at being friends. I know it feels selfish, but you need to get out of there and away from him.