Ringing in the new year with a little bit of love

1/07/2015 The Charmer 0 Comments

The Lady posted a summary of her year's love interests (and, might I add, it is quite the impressive list). I thought about doing the same, but as I reflected over my year I realized that there really weren't that many boys that made a dent in my love life this year. This is mainly because my year was made up of a whole lot of chunks in which I seemed to distance myself from dating situations.
January-March was spent on a mission. Obviously no dating there.
March- May was spent feeling awkward around guys and I literally found myself trying to run from them on occasion.
In June-August I was an EFY counselor. This was a deceiving time of life, since I actually thought that being surrounded by hundreds of excited, gospel-loving EFY RMs might have resulted in a little bit of summer lovin'. However, the truth is that working 24/7 and flying to a different state every weekend meant that in the little bit of spare time I did have, I was usually sleeping. Besides, even when I did find myself interested in someone I only ended up spending 1 or two weeks around him. Not a lot of time to cultivate those little sparks into something bigger.
From September-December I was in China. And despite the fact that in this country there are approximately 24 million unmarried men around my age, most of them don't speak the same language that I do. Thus there really aren't too many viable options for dating, 

However, mixed in amongst those dateless months were two very important weeks. One was the week before I left for China when I met a guy who impressed me more than any other guy I've ever met. The other was last week, when this same guy flew 5,000 miles to come and visit me when I came to the wonderful but also distressing realization that...well....I love him. 
Very much so.

For as long as I can remember, I have been afraid of marriage. I don't know if I could tell you exactly why, but I have definitely gone to many lengths and many excuses to avoid it at all costs. There's just something about that level of commitment and about putting that much trust in one person that kind of freaks me out. But last week as I spent time around Ammon, that fear of marriage started to slip away a little bit until it was just a tiny little speck of anxiety. And amazingly, I was okay with that. I realized that I would very happily marry this boy. In fact, I would even do it this year...that is, if he wasn't going on a mission. But he is, and that is wonderful, and even though there is a tiny selfish part of me that would like to say "umm maybe you can stay with me instead?" I am really excited for him.

So, I guess you could say Operation Boyfriend-in-China was a success. It was a blast and the time went by way too quickly. I have to confess that I was a little unsure at the beginning and it was a little on the awkward side (hey now, look at that layout of my year again....the majority of it has been spent being AWKWARD around boys and NOT dating them. What did you expect?). Luckily it only took me two days to get over it (poor Ammon) and then things were fabulous.

So. What now?


the charmer

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