The Shopping Theory: A Guest Post

4/14/2011 The Romantic 2 Comments

What's the first thing you do when you walk in a store? You start browsing. You pick out a few clothes that are attractive to you (and a few that aren't), carrying them around with you until you're ready to try them on. What's the first thing you do when you move into a new ward, or start a new class? You browse! You find what is attractive to you, get to know them, until you're ready to try them out.

Then it's time for the dressing room. This is hard, because you are putting yourself out there. You are in your most vulnerable state. You pick the first piece of clothing and pull it on. Maybe it fits maybe it doesn't. Maybe it makes you look and feel great, chances are it doesn't. When you go on a date with a guy, you are putting yourself out there. And sometimes it works out with the guy, mostly it doesn't. You just don't feel great when you're with him, even though it is a perfectly nice shirt that looks good on that other girl in the dressing.

Once you weed through the clothes in the dressing room (and you have to go through a lot just to get two or three items you like), you put back the ones you don't like. At this point there is a lot more digging into the clothes you have chosen. First thing you do, look at the price. You don't want to have to give too much for that shirt--I mean, after all, you have to eat and pay rent still. No point investing too much for something only so so. Then you look at the care directions. Dry clean? Too high maintenance. Hand wash? It's a possibility, though not ideal. I would be willing to make changes if I really liked the shirt. Line dry? Definitely doable. The best though is just plan old washer and dryer.

If you leave with one shirt, you're going to think of that shopping trip a success.

But, unfortunately, sometimes nothing you try on works. Either they are too loose, too tight, too long, too complex, too scratchy, too short; they make you look boxy, fat, or buxom. The fabric which looked so pretty on the hanger or the mannequin ends up being weird on a real body. (Of course, I have to take a moment and say that sometimes something that you didn't like at all when it was on the hangar looks AMAZING on you. But I digress.) And, so, you dejectedly leave the store empty handed. It's hard to feel confident and happy after something that beats you down like looking terrible in everything you try on. You look around at all the other customers and they all look happy and amazing and you start wondering what is wrong with you. So, you resolve not to go shopping again. You'll just be happy with what you have at home (or with the plain t-shirt that isn't to exciting, but it's safe).

Of course, we are women--we can't stop shopping for too long. So, a couple of months later finds us back in the store, looking for that one shirt that will make us look, feel, and be awesome.

-the Maiden Aunt

Thanks for this insightful post from one of our dearly dedicated readers. You rock Maiden Aunt! And on a semi-related note, I could use a trip to University Mall right about now. How about you? Also, this website is cute.

-the Anti-Austens