Incidents from the Life of the Charmer: Drama Boys Pt. 1

9/23/2014 The Charmer 0 Comments

Usually when we think about drama in relationships, we automatically think of the WOMEN as being the perpetrators.
Is this fair?
In all honesty, I think we probably do tend to be the more dramatic ones, but the stories that appear on this blog are proof that there are quite a few dramatic men out there as well. (Or should I say boys, not men...?)

Before leaving for China, I had my own fair share of dramatic interactions with one of these fellows. I mentioned him briefly when I mentioned that I'd had a short-lived relationship with a fellow RRM (that's recently returned missionary) about 2 months after coming home from my mission. In all honesty, I'm not even sure that it lasted long enough to call it a relationship. It literally unfolded about 2 weeks before I left for EFY and had already died (or so I thought) even before I hopped on that plane to head to Provo.

The ironic thing is that when I wrote about this relationship previously on the blog, I said that it "just...ended. Nothing too dramatic or exciting. I just left, and that was that."

Clearly, I had spoken too soon.

Sure, Jackson was a nice enough guy, but like I mentioned, everything just happened way too fast. The kid basically confessed his love for me after a week and a half. And even though we had great conversation and some fun dates during our 2-week stretch , he was a little immature (which is to be expected, as he was only 21 and hadn't even set foot in a college classroom yet). During our brief stint together, I did kiss him, but I have to confess I actually ended up feeling a little bit unsure about it afterwards. In fact, I think it was after the first kiss that I started taking a few BIG steps backward, realizing this was all happening too quickly.

Anyway, over the summer he would occasionally text me but we honestly didn't talk much. When I came home for 2 weeks after EFY before heading off to China, I hadn't really expected to spend much (or any) time with him. However, it seemed like the second I got off the plane he was already texting me and asking if we could get together sometime soon. After a few excuses on my part, he finally got me to agree to go with him and the missionaries to a lesson on Thursday. The investigator ended up bailing, the missionaries left, and suddenly I found myself on a date with him. We got some lunch, it was fine, whatever. He asked if I'd play the piano at a baptism that Saturday. I said yes.

The day in between Thursday and Saturday was very significant; it was the day that Ammon entered my life. As much as I'm hesitant to ever use the term "love at first sight," I think it's fair to say that at that point, Jackson or any other potential suitors were completely out of the running. So the next day at the baptism, when I saw Jackson getting cozy with another ward member named Claire, I didn't care. In fact, I was a bit relieved, since it meant he'd leave me alone.

Not so.

The next evening Jackson sent me a text and told me that he'd love some "Charmer time" that night. I told him no, I was skyping with my best friend and it might be a while (we were talking about Ammon, hellloooo). Jackson was relentless. He told me he didn't care if it was a late night, he just really wanted to spend time with me before I left for China. At this moment in time, I was of course asking my bestie for advice on how to let this kid down softly. I finally decided on the somewhat spineless approach of avoiding outright rejection and instead told him, "Ya know, I was kind of under the impression that you were interested in Claire now." He then proceeded to ask me WHERE I'd gotten that idea from and told me that Claire had just been a good friend for years. Then after not hearing back from me (come on, man, I'm skyping the BFF here), he admitted that although Claire was really into him, he wasn't sure how he felt about her because "he was still interested in the last girl he kissed." (I had to ask for clarification to find out if he was talking about me or someone He meant me.)

My answer was still no. I wasn't going to hang out with him that night. A bit dejected, he told me that he hoped he'd get to see me again since he was going to be gone camping for most of the week. I told him that I probably wouldn't see him until church on Sunday, since my week was going to be pretty busy (and I was planning on spending any spare time I DID have with Ammon).

Jackson sent me random camping pictures all week long...him on a mountain, him growing a beard, him by a river...and then when he finally got home on Thursday, texted and asked if I wanted to go out with him sometime that weekend. I told him I was pretty busy, but then he got a bit pouty and asked me, "Why do you keep blowing me off?" Feeling kind of bad, I apologized that I didn't have a lot of time this week as I was trying to get everything taken care of before leaving the country in 3 days. He told me he had made me a CD of EFY songs that he wanted to give me on Sunday. I told him that I would look forward to it. That seemed to appease him and the incessant texts stopped.


[I know leaving you hanging at this point isn't much of well, leaving you hanging, as Jackson hasn't seemed particularly dramatic yet. But I promise you'll see that he's got a little flair for the dramatic in part 2...]

the charmer

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