Wake Up, This is the Real World Calling

12/31/2010 The Virgin 0 Comments

I think sometimes we get caught up in the bubble and completely forget that the experience at BYU truly unlike any other.


It isn't until we are confronted with the reality of the real world that we are brought back down to earth.


Obviously I've had a personal experience with this, otherwise I wouldn't be writing this, would I?


So the story:

I'm at home for break. None of my high school friends are Mormon. Their college experiences are completely different from mine. They remind that it is not normal to date for two weeks and then get engaged. One of my friends was lamenting that she never dates. The "dating" scene at her university consists of hooking up with guys after they buy you a drink. You are either in a relationship or hooking up with guys.


Now don't get me wrong. I know that not everyone dates at BYU and I know that some people just like to hook up. I also know that while my friend's experience is not the experience of every college student, it is somewhat nice to be reminded that the world doesn't work like BYU.


So on the off chance of sounding cheesy, perhaps we shouldn't complain so much about our dates.




Wait... I'm sorry that's impractical.

Rather, perhaps we should appreciate the unique opportunity that the Bubble has given us, and while we complain we should also enjoy laughing at the ridiculous predicament that we have placed ourselves in by attending BYU.


Kisses lovelies,

The Virgin

0 comments:

Just over 24 hours

12/18/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

That just might be a record. Home for a little over 24 hours, and I've already had my first "I have a friend I want you to meet" chat, and a marriage lecture....

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

Creeper Lovin'

12/16/2010 The Romantic 1 Comments

Creeper Loving: verb 1. To love someone in an unrequited stalker-like manner

example: I creeper love my my home teacher.

Awhile ago, some friends and I coined the term creeper love. It's a little bit more than a crush, but not the "feelings" stage. You know this person is not really your type, and things probably wouldn't work out. So you love them from afar. And even find yourself staring at them during the ward Christmas party..... awkward....

I creeper love this guys' apartment in the ward. I know I'm not really compatible with any of them. But I find myself in fits of giggles whenever I'm around them. And yeah, I've definitely been touching their elbows....

What will I ever do with myself?

xoxo
-the Romantic

1 comments:

'Tis the Season

12/12/2010 The Romantic 1 Comments

And so it begins, another holiday season with constant reminders of my singularity of person.

Last night, I went to a festive holiday sweater party. The invitation didn't stipulate that it would be a couple's party. But a couple's party it turned out to be. I stood awkwardly by the chips and dip as everyone speculated over the upcoming nuptials of the couples in attendance. It went like this, "Marriage blah blah blah. Dates, blah blah blah. Honeymoon. More babbling here."
What could I have added to the conversation? Nothing on marriage certainly. So instead I piped up with a "Hey, I'm not getting married. But I am getting published."That's right. I stuck it to those couples in their matching holiday sweaters. Just because I'm single, doesn't mean I don't have exciting news too. Right?

But this encounter led me to a frightening realization. I will soon be returning to the land of my fore fathers (and by that, I just mean back home to CA). And soon the questions will come in torrents: Are you dating anyone? Got any special friends back at the Y? SOOOO, who is he? wink wink, nudge nudge.
The bloody inquisition of Christmas break 2010 is about to begin. But rather than Roman Catholic Priests drowning me in Holy Water, I'll be facing the mustached elderly women of my home ward Relief Society, torturing me with blind dates and their nephew/grandson/some obscure relative's phone number . Take your cover girls. It might be a long two weeks.























"No! NO! Sister Smith, please, I promise I'll look up Nephi as soon as I get back."

xoxo
-the Romantic

1 comments:

Finals Musings

12/11/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

"A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment." -Jane Austen

True dat Jane, true dat.


0 comments:

Questions Answered

12/06/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments


A few posts ago, these questions were posed:
Here is a question for you ladies, how are the guys perceived who take out girls on dates just for fun? Are they considered fun but not serious? Is it harder to tell if a guy like that likes you?

I will attempt to answer these well posed questions. Please note that I will answer them from my own formed opinions after living in student wards for the past four years.

Guys who take girls on dates just for fun are usually perceived as not too serious about dating. They date for fun, they know how to date, and often their dates are creative and enjoyable. But just because they date often and sometimes have multiple dates a week, that doesn't mean they're bad guys. In fact, all the men that I can think of that date often, are usually the best guys. They follow the counsel of the Brethren to date rather than just hang out. But from a girl's perspective, I would say that it's harder to tell if a guy is interested in you if he dates often. Does a guy have any interest in you when he's also taken several of your roomies on dates? It's hard to say. For those answers, I would have to delve deep into the male psyche. And that journey would be a fearful one to undertake indeed.

As for myself, I prefer a man who doesn't date too often. I don't like feeling as though I'm prey living in the wild African deserts. (Note illustration above. I mean, really, who wants to be chased by that guy?) I place the serial dater in the same category as our female lioness. I don't think anyone wants to feel hunted, or numbered as one of many in a herd of gazelles. It's like I was telling my roomies earlier today, though I identify with many of the great heroines of literature, I mostly identify with Jo from Little Women. Give me a deep German man named Friedrich any day, who is first and foremost my friend, and we'll call it good.

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

Memo to self: never read Jane Eyre before bed

11/30/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

As I journeyed to the great Idaho wilderness for Thanksgiving break, I was left with two choices: homework, or reading a novel (for fun!). I brought my homework with me, but unfortunately, my back pack remained safely zipped in my roomie's bedroom whilst jane eyre called out to me from her book shelf.

The choice was easy. Jane Eyre it was.

Living my romantic life vicariously through novels is so much the better choice than dating these days...or at least less awkward.

I viciously poured over the book for three days. Our departure loomed before us the next morning. Back to Provo, and back to above zero degree weather. I curled up in bed with the covers all around, determined to finish the tale of Jane and Mr. Rochester. But alas, I turned in with a mere 50 pages left. Right at the point where Mr. Rochester calls for Jane miles and miles away.

That is the scene that I fell asleep to.

And then I dreamed of my ex-boyfriend. "I will always need you" he said in my dream.

That is why we will not read Jane Eyre before bed again. For it never bodes well in the heart break department. I identify far too well the title character.


Well enough with the dramatics... back to studying!

(Although, I'm sure my posts will be quite numerous this week as I 'prepare'/procrastinate finals studying)

xoxo
-The Romantic

ps. for your viewing pleasure next march

0 comments:

Nothing.

11/17/2010 The Romantic 5 Comments

No sparks, no fireworks. Nothing. Not even dislike or loathing reared their ugly faces. But at least that would have been something.

Bland... That pretty much sums up the date I had last Saturday.

Sad to say, the most exciting part was getting ready. I even curled my hair and borrowed some of my room mates "seductive spray" as she fondly calls it. And then I opened the door, and saw that I was over dressed. Well, not over dressed for the activity, but overdressed comparatively.

My friend texted me when I got home, asking me how it was. The only word to describe it was alright. I felt pretty apathetic about the whole thing. Which makes me feel a little bad.

Everything was executed the way it was supposed to be. Doors were opened, a stop at Cocoa Bean was made, everything was planned to a T. The night was neither too long, nor too short. But there was just something so boring about it all.

I think that sometimes BYU boy is an 80 year old man trapped inside a 21 year old body. I guess my back-up plan of marrying a rich 80 year man so I can inherit all of is money is out of the question. I realize now that I would die first. Of sheer boredom.

Perhaps this weekend will reward my hard work of tests and finals with something a little bit more exciting.
Until then,
xoxo
-the Romantic

5 comments:

This has to be some sort of fluke or something

11/11/2010 The Romantic 2 Comments

I have a confession to make. I don't really date all that often.

GASP!

I know, shocking isn't it? How is it that I write on a dating blog then? I suppose it stems from the fact that I have a fantastical amounts of romantical ideals. And also, I seem to always have the strangest experiences with men.

I was recounting some of my favorite boy stories with a friend of mine the other night. Here's just a little taste:
-There was one boy, recently returned from his mission that my room mate liked. He did not like her back the same way. But he and I became very close. In fact, one night we cuddled. And my roomie was there, we thought she had been asleep. We thought we'd made sure. We called her name, told her to wake up. We really thought she'd been asleep. But she wasn't. Oh no she was not indeed. I found out later that she'd been pretending, and eavesdropping on everything we'd been talking about. And then we found out the boy had a semi-girlfriend at BYU-H anyway. So who he liked in Provo was moot point...It was perhaps the biggest drama of my entire life.

-Right before I left on my study abroad, my ex-boyfriend went crazy with grief that I was leaving, and drew me on his car... CREEEEEPY. I never saw it, I only heard about it while on my semester abroad. After I came back and he was dating someone else, I confronted him about it. But he said that it was in fact not me but just a "representational figure". Ha! My friends and I saw his car one day. The "representational figure" was scrubbed off. If it wasn't me, then why scrub it off?

-I scratched my cornea once. It happened to be while I was "watching" sound of music with my boyfriend at the time. i promise i wasn't being scandalous. but really, how does one scratch their cornea when kissing?? i still am not sure to this day.

This is just a small piece of what I go through with men. Best Friend Guy (who just got engaged on saturday, insert tears of sorrow here) thinks I should start having cameras follow me around, just so people see that I'm not making this stuff up, nor do I bring it upon myself. I just seem to attract the crazies.

So this semester, I've gone on a grand total of five dates! WHOO!

I think that's more than the rest of my years at BYU combined.

And one of my FHE brothers asked me out for Saturday! I think this really must be some sort of fluke. I've been going on dates with semi-normal people, and actually having fun! Saturday night, BYU boy (he is the biggest psycho fan of byu that you will ever meet) and I are going to the choir concert. Which is really nice, because I've mentioned how much I like the arts, and not sports. It shows thought. Although I will go to sporting events. I am a cougar after all.

It makes me wonder what I'm doing differently this semester, besides asking strange men for their number on the freeway of course.

It has to be some sort of fluke.

2 comments:

What sort of mess have we gotten oursevles into this time?

11/05/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

Remember how I went out with the boy I met on the freeway?

I guess I failed to mention that there was another car boy. A funnier/cuter one. Well after the first car boy added me on facebook, so did car boy 2, who happens to be car boy 1's room mate.

Well one thing leads to another, and Car Boy 2 and I end up going out for ice cream Tuesday night. And I felt like a bit of a floozy. Because I don't think car boy 1 knows we went out. Which wouldn't be a super big deal I guess. Except I think he had a good time on our date, and when he stopped by today to pick up the all sports pass I borrowed last weekend, he gave me a hug goodbye. And I don't think he's one of those hugger types. Originally, he raised his hand for a high five, but then just switched to both arms wide open... awkward awkward awkward

But I think I could like car boy 2!! It was the first date I've been on this semester where I haven't thought, "Oh hey this is fun. But I wish I was here with Sweater Guy". So that's good right? I think he had a good time. He mentioned wanting to hang out again. And we have texted a bit this week. I invited him to a bonfire tonight. But he's out of town this weekend.

On another note: We will title this "Coincidence or not?" (It's like getting two blog posts for the price of one!!!)
Sweater Guy's best friend emails me on Sunday to see how I'm doing. It was kind of random. But not completely out of character. We were close-ish. But since we're not in the same social group anymore, I haven't talked to him in over a month. I answer back with the usuals. I tell I still miss Sweater Guy but that I'm doing ok. And even dating people. And then mysteriously, the next morning, I awaken to three missed calls. All in a row. All from a blocked number.
1:05 am. 1:06. 1:07 am. No Messages.

Of course I didn't answer because I was asleep. My suspicion is that they were from Sweater Guy. And I don't know why he would call me, except that the next day was the Sufjan Stevens concert. Which we were supposed to attend together. And maybe he missed me... Later in the week he messages me on facebook. This message is just a link about lil wayne getting out of prison. Lil Wayne was a little inside joke we had when we first started dating. I don't know what he's up to these days. He could already be dating someone else. Which is whatever.

Are all these events connected? Or is it just my over active imagination?
But even if they weren't, I was still upset at his popping back into my life without any explanation. Last time we talked he hung up the phone on me because it's too painful to be my friend. Which kind of felt like someone ripping my heart from my chest and beating it with a mallet. So is he saying he's ready to be friends? Because I'm not really sure a) I want to be his friend and b) maybe it's still too painful for me too.

Well that's all folks. I need to go mull this mess over.... Have a pleasant date night!

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

3 out of 5 stars

10/30/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

And now, for a recounting of the infamous car boy date.

I personally think it's tacky to ask a girl out in text form. But I do suppose since we never talked before (besides the whole going 60 miles an hour on the freeway thing), that a text message was the least threatening way to ask me out.

I was flipping about before, as per my normal pre-date routine. I don't know why. It just always happens. My room is still wrecked because of the flurried whirlwind of clothing that tornado-ed around my room last night. I opted for a simple over sized plaid jumper type thing, with skinny jeans, and my converse. My hair was curled, and my make up reapplied. The way I saw it, things would either be horribly awkward, or really fun. I was going to try my best to make it as fun as possible.

He picked me up around 6:45. And off we went to the first basket ball game of the season. I thought conversation flowed quite well from the beginning. The game actually went by pretty quickly. And the conversation was good. But it was pretty apparent from the get go that we don't really have ANY interests in common. He basically only likes sports. I do not. I'll go to games of course, but mostly just to be with the people I'm with.

Something he said bothered me though. I asked him what he wanted to do with his major. He said he didn't really know, he just wanted to have a well paying job when he graduated. This comment made me think. I think my biggest turn off is apathy. I think I've probably given up on my husband having the same interests as me, but I still want him to be passionate about something; and appreciate my passions, so that we can share them with each other.

After the game, we went to Sammy's. I finally had a pie shake for the first time after living in P-town for four years. It was scrumptious.

I'm pretty sure he was having a good time, because then he suggested we check out a haunted house by brick oven. Here I should mention that I am the biggest scardey cat on the face of the planet. It only takes a whispered, "Hey, what was that sound?" to send me hurtling into a major panic attack. So I told him we could go, but I'd probably grab onto his arm the whole time. But then he just made fun of me for it. I know it's pretend! But I have horrible night vision!

I guess by the end of the date, what it came down to is that he was trying to hard to be "cool". The basketball game was fun. But the macho, I'm too cool for this haunted house attitude ruined it.

I could have invited him to my ward Halloween party tonight. He did mention several times he had no plans for the evening. But I opted not to.

Maybe I'll say yes to a second date. But I just don't see it happening at this point.

0 comments:

Recent Development

10/28/2010 The Virgin 0 Comments

There was a small change made in my holiday plans last night.

He asked me to go home with him for Thanksgiving.

He doesn't live in Orem. It's a substantial flight.


I'm so excited.



How early is too early to start planning outfit ideas?
Don't answer that...

xoxo
The Virgin

0 comments:

Heeey Jimmer!

10/27/2010 The Romantic 1 Comments

A date with car boy to the first BYU b-ball game of the season? check yes...


and for those of you who are worried about me going on a random date with some man i just met on the freeway. DON'T. I checked him out. And he's actually in my friend's ward. Small world eh?

1 comments:

Traffic Jam

10/23/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

A group of us were on our way to the great metropolis of Salt Lake City to see the Orchestra at Temple Square perform. I was excited. I curled my hair. Dressed up. And even wore my signature trench-coat scarf combo.

We piled in our friend's car, all five of us. We were ready to roll; up until we hit I-15 that is. 30 minutes after getting on the freeway, we still hadn't hit Pleasant Grove yet. But it was all good. We were just a group of friends, having fun, chatting it up, living our lives.

And then there was this other car. We could see that there were Cougars, just like us, painfully stuck in traffic on a Friday night. It soon became a little waving game. Each car would wave enthusiastically when we passed each other, like the long lost free way buddies we were.

And then they passed us once more, the back window of the driver's side rolled down. So naturally, me being on the passenger side, I rolled down my window too. We chatted. Found ou they were from Provo too. They looked like a friendly bunch (obviously). The traffic was beginning to speed up. I couldn't let the opportunity slip away while the fun was getting started.

So I held up my phone, and motioned to the guy I'd been "chatting" with that he should give me his number. And then he did!!!!! Holding up his fingers, he pantomimed his number while we went 60mph.

I was shocked at myself. I never do things like that. EVER.

The digits were saved in my phone under car boy.
"What next?" I asked my companions. "Text him!" was their reply.

So I did. Banter ensued....

And I'm pretty sure I'll have a date next week with car boy.

Just something to think about next time you're stuck in traffic. ;0)

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

On the Prowl

10/21/2010 The Romantic 2 Comments

There is a girl in my ward. And I thought she was flirtatious before last night, but man. I had NO IDEA. Before, she just wanted to date. But now, she just wants a boyfriend. And everyone is talking about it. Our FHE brothers remarked on it to a room mate last night. They said she's literally going door to door, making her rounds as she stalks the poor unsuspecting elders in our ward.
One room mate asked her why she doesn't find one boy to like and then focus in on him, and date him. She replied that that just isn't how she works. She's picked several boys to focus on, and will continue to focus on all of them until one of them wants to date her. It's madness! Madness I say! Several boys came over last night. And there was some serious physical contact going on. And I don't just mean elbow touching. I'm talking thigh grabs, upper arm grabs, and arms around the backs of their chairs.
The craziest thing of all, was that I could see this working. The boys were literally melting in her attention.
I'm really interested to see how this all plays out... If you've ever take Anthro 101 from Professor Crandall, it's like the hunting movie we have to watch. The hunters chase a giraffe for five days as the poison from a spear takes over their nervous system. And they don't move anymore. Our Lioness is slowly circling until eventually, she will catch one of these poor boys in her grasp. It's sad, but you just can't look away because on the other hand, it's just too entertaining.

-the Romantic.

ps. guitar hero is MIA. maybe i did read the signals wrong... but i think i'm really ok with it.

2 comments:

Elbows Touching

10/16/2010 The Romantic 5 Comments

It has become the joke amongst my friends and I that touching a man's elbow is the way to capture his attention. Whether or not that's really true, I've been practicing lately to see if it really works.

And I think that maybe it does.

So I haven't even really being putting the elbow grabbing method into practice, I've just been joking around with boys that I will grab their elbow when they do "attractive" things. Such as play the guitar at the ward talent show.

And then, all of a sudden Guitar Hero(he plays guitar quite well) pops on facebook chat all the time now. He comes over, wanting to hang out, and watch arrested development on his big screen.

The next thing I know, I come home at curfew, having watched 6 episodes of arrested development, sitting next to him (arms touching) on the big couch (with no one else sitting on the big couch), deeply confused. And analyzing everything to death.

Does that mean he's interested? I mean, you don't just sit on the big couch, right next to someone, arms touching, for six episodes of arrested development, if there's no interest right?!

It's times like these that make me feel like the Harvard Sailing Team understands the woman psyche way too well.

My favorite part was when I was dissecting this story with one of my friends in German class the next day, and my 80 year old Professor chimed in. (To be read with a German accent) "It does not matter if your arms were touching. It matter if your skin was touching. Were your arms bare?" Danke Herr Professor. I will keep that in mind from now one. I informed him that I was wearing three quarter length sleeves. Subsequently, there was no skin contact that night.
So here are my concerns:
1) It's my turn to invite him to do something now. But I'm not sure if I really want to or not. I'm still getting over Sweater Guy, truth be told. And I think that's ok, because we only officially broke up about a month and half ago.
2) So, let's say I am ready/interested in Guitar Hero. What if I'm just reading all the signs wrong? And then I do something too forward, and get my heart smashed into thousands of tiny little pieces?

I think the plan will be to just continue being friendly. And try not to freak out.

I can't wait for the day when I'm married, and I can look back at dating and just laugh.

xoxo
-the Romantic

5 comments:

Sacrifices

10/05/2010 The Virgin 1 Comments

Let's get one thing straight. I don't bake.

I am the queen of baking disasters.

So let's just all agree that the fact that I'm making him his mother's famous lemon cake for his birthday is kind of a big deal.

And let's all pray that it turns out...

Heaven knows I could use a break.

Le Virgin

1 comments:

Sometimes Guys are Jerks

10/03/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

Remember the story of the Dramatic One and the Skeleton?

He told her in text he didn't have feelings for her. Three years of emotions destroyed with one simple electronic message. The Dramatic One has pulled through remarkably well. And I am quite proud of her.

She's been there for me through the all of my break ups. I'm only happy to return the favor.

But on the other hand, sometimes guys can be sweet.

My conversations with the Virgin lately have been touching reports of her current blissful relationship status. Bravo dear sir!

A funny story to end the post:

In efforts to be more forward and flirtatious, I was trying to text this boy that he was a super cute guy. It fit in context of the conversation ok? It wasn't until the next day after receiving his confusing response that I realized I had forgotten a word... cute. So I just called him a super guy... (Insert forehead slap here). There is no way to fix that! Gah! I give up. He hasn't really texted me since. Our plans for gelatto seem to be put on hold indefinitely. I felt like a giant zit on the face of the BYU dating scene. My roomies insist that I am not. I will try to believe them and solider onward, hoping that one day, one man will find my Mary-like antics endearing and not ...weird.

-the Romantic

0 comments:

Sometimes You Date Your Best Friend

10/01/2010 The Virgin 0 Comments

And you couldn't be happier.

xoxo
V

0 comments:

A Triangle of Sorts

9/24/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

I suppose I should have given more background to the Yom Kippur date.

On my study abroad, I met one of my now dearest friends. We will call her The Dramatic One. Her life is very dramatic. Mostly in a good, distracting, exciting way. The Dramatic One has been IN LOVE with this boy for about three years now. We will call him Skeleton (because I think he kind of looks like one).

We've always wondered what the Skeleton's intentions towards the Dramatic One were. But after a letter fall out just before he came home from his mission, we all figured love would never flourish between the two, unless it was the platonic kind.

Now, enter in new school year. I spend basically all of my time with the Dramatic One. It helps me to take my mind off of Sweater Guy (more to come on that later). In the process, I meet Skeleton and all of his room mates. I absolutely adore them all. They are the perfect guys. PEEEEERRRRRFECT. I would marry them. Individually, and as a whole...Yeah. But the two I really like are in that pre-relationship stage. (BOO!) So, that leaves us with Skeleton who is best friends with my best friend the Dramatic One. Are you still following dear reader?

So Skeleton is texting the Dramatic One. He asks her which of her friend she should ask out. She tells him to ask me because I just broke it off with my boyfriend and I need to be around a really good guy. Hence the Yom Kippur fireside!

It was an ok date. Short and sweet. He topped it off by giving me a mixed cd at the end of the night with some of my favorite bands:
Vampire Weekend
Belle and Sebastian
The Decemberists
Animal Collective
Great way to win my heart right?
So here's the deal. The Dramatic One swears she's ok with the date because she really doesn't think anything will happen between them. So I go. But I'm confused. Because the more I interact with the two, the more I think he really does like her. He has the look. You all know the look right? The look a guy gives a girl when he thinks she's the most amazing person he's ever met. They text allllll the time. When hanging out in a group, his attention is mostly directed at her. That sort of thing.

He told her he thought I hated the date and that saying good bye to me was awkward because my complex is so busy.... Well, here are my thoughts: Something maybe could happen with the Skeleton, but maybe I'm not really ready to date anyone. Even if they do send me hilarious texts wishing me a happy autumnal equinox. Also, I'm not really that interested. And I want to somehow hook it up between Skeleton and the Dramatic One.

I feel like I'm in the middle of a love triangle. Only I'm not really in love with anyone. Skeleton just hasn't realized he's in love yet. And the Dramatic One will never confess her feelings.

What a conundrum.

but about Sweater Guy... did I mention we said goodbye forever? Well, we tried to. Or I tried to. I deleted him from everything. Phone, facebook, the whole deal. It was just better for me that way.
He called on my birthday. He has a present for me. Gah. He still hasn't given it to me yet. We shall see how it goes...

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

Happy Yom Kippur!

9/16/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

I have a date to the Yom Kippur fireside on Sunday.

And I'm actually excited for it...

I know what you're thinking. A fireside? Really?

But I think Elder Scott was right. A movie is really stupid!

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

Oh President Samuelson

9/07/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

Did anyone else catch the devo this morning?

Apparently we should not wait until we order our cap and gown to look for an eternal mate to build a family with.

Does this mean I should stop my boy fast and move in on my hunky FHE brother with the dreamy eyes?

I would just like everyone to take a moment to also note the irony of President Samuelson's talk: "Appropriate Zeal".

That is all.

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

Staking one's claim.

9/06/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

My biggest pet peeve of BYU ladies, is their tendency at the beginning of the semester to scope out their the prospects, and then stake their claim.

Like the gold rush days of old, the ladies swoop in like miners, looking for promising criteria. Is he cute? check. engineering major? pre-med? pre-law? check. served his mission somewhere exotic? check.
their future down to the names of their children is planned out in mere minutes. very quickly, sunday evening socials are put into place. invitations are very exclusive. there has to be the perfect balance of males and females. but none of the prospects can meet; for fear of closing herself off to any of them.
i guess i can't be too bothered by this. every girl at BYU does it. however, there is a lovely girl in my ward who always stakes out five different claims. She is on the man prowl. Like a fierce lioness stalking her prey, she has cleverly laid several traps to capture the unsuspecting men in her pearly white chompers. and the weirdest thing is... it works! she had three dates this last week. it's only the first week of school.

sheesh.

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

Breaking up is hard to do...

9/02/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

I think the hardest part about breaking up with someone is losing your best friend even though they're still around.

Whether we've been together or not, Sweater Guy has been a part of my life for the past 8 months. That is a really long time in Provo years (where two weeks can equal an entire courtship). And now? It's like I have to pretend he's dead or something. Breaking up is just a weird.

Also, I'm not very good at it. It seems that it always takes me 2 or 3 times with these long drawn out conversations that last for hours where tears are shed by both parties. It's so dramatic...
I'm anxious to see what this new school year holds.

But I think it's time for another boy fast. No boyfriends. Just boy friends. I don't have the emotional constitution for dating.

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

Back on the Market

7/28/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

Oh to live the single life again.

It didn't last very long did it?

But instead of being bitter, I know it was the right thing to do. As compatible as Sweater Guy and I are for each other, we work better as friends.

Sunday night was very dramatic and included tears on both our parts. I opted for a break instead of a break up. But I knew it was over and that it is a good thing; even though I didn't care to admit it.

We talked more last night, and ended things officially. Our relationship was getting too serious and both of us were feeling guilty because we both know it won't work out in the end. Which was weird since everything was so great between us.

Yes, it's sad. And I'll still have my mourning period which will include generous portions of ice cream.

But I am good... really truly. Everything will turn out the way it's meant to.

xoxo
-The Romantic

0 comments:

Date My Single Kid

7/15/2010 The Virgin 0 Comments

I don't know exactly what it is, but there is something that happens when Zoobie girls reach a certain age.

Suddenly everyone is ready for you to get married and they comment on it all the time.

"So are you dating anyone?" they ask coyly, as if I would keep it a secret...
"No," I reply gruffly.
"Is there anyone you want to date?" (This usually is included with some sort of elbow nudge or a wink.)
"No."
"You know what? I should set you up with so and so. He's so cute. He's friends with my son/nephew/weird cousin. Would you like that?"
"Sure," I say already planning the escape for this blind date.

And eventually your mother picks up on this and starts badgering you as well.

Suddenly it becomes apparent that she had other goals for you than just graduating.

Heaven forbid I graduate without a secondary Mrs. degree. Not all of us double major, you know...

The Virgin

0 comments:

It's facebook offical!

7/12/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

And it was his doing too! I take this as a very good sign.


I'm at EFY yet again. It's been a two week stint. Someone really misses me! hehe.

We have plans to make really awesome t-shirts when i get back on saturday. i have such a good boyfriend.


xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

Meeting the Parents!

7/03/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

Yikes!

So Sweater Guy's parents are in town for the holiday weekend. I met them last night. It didn't go horribly wrong. But it didn't go fantastic. I wish I had a more bubbly personality. We'll see how things go today at the extended family bbq later today.... (double yikes!)

I did have this week off from EFY. But I'll be gone for two weeks straight with these next sessions!

It's going to be harder this time.

Last night we went to the Freedom Festival. Somehow I convinced him we should get matching "friendship" bracelets. They are awesome!

Then we danced the night away listening to Swedish pop outside of his car.

And this last week he took me on a surprise date to an Art Museum.

I'm sorely going to miss him.



xoxo
-The Romantic

0 comments:

DTR

6/29/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

guess who has a boyfriend??


:0)

xoxo
-The Romantic

0 comments:

FYI about EFY

6/25/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

This post is cutting into my nap time, but I thought ya'll might want an update.



THERE ARE GORGEOUS COUNSELORS GALORE! I am quite the fan.


And yet, Sweater Guy left me a message this week with the Beach Boys singing, "I wish they all could be California girls"
One guess as to where I'm from. (sigh) it was really cute. I miss him. Lots.

I love EFY.
My girls are amazing. My boys are precious.


Well, I guess it's nap time....

Last dance of the week tonight! WAHOO!


xoxo
-The Romantic

0 comments:

Coming Home

6/21/2010 The Virgin 1 Comments

For those of us not staying in Provo during the summer, home can be an awkward place.

The YSA ward consists of two groups where I'm from: the locals, who are nearing thirty, balding, and claiming that their parents' mother in law unit is in fact their "own place", and of course the bug boys, who are flighty, over sexed, and machismo.

(And never mind the boys from my home stake, that's like peeing in the pool, not to mention it feels extremely incestuous.)


And you ask why I choose to go to the family ward and skip out on Sunday school to play with the babies in the foyer?


Kisses,

The Virgin

1 comments:

Limbo

6/15/2010 The Romantic 1 Comments

It appears I'm stuck in the convoluted, ambiguous gray area that comes with "dating" someone, but not dating them exclusively.

Oh Sweater Guy, how you torture me!

Skipping all the boring details, I guess I should just say that we hung out friday night, had a great time palling around.

He said he wants to "court" me, but not have a girlfriend(and yes, those quotes mean he actually used that word). I know it sounds like he's reading me a line, but because of the complexities of the situation, I'm inclined to believe him. BUT I WANT TO BE HIS GIRLFRIEND! baaaaaahhhh!!!! (don't read too much into that last sentence, or the following exclamation. I'm in a very dramatic state of mind this evening)

To make things even more complicated, I just got hired to to work EFY for four weeks.
Goodbye Sweater Guy....
The one consolation is that I won't feel guilty that my COWs will be the counselors anymore.

xoxo
-the Romantic

1 comments:

A Congratulatory Post

5/31/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

I forgot to mention!

The most felicitous congratulations to one of my dear fellow ladies-in-writing: The HomeMaker!. Recently engaged, The HomeMaker is done with dating forever! Well, at least with anyone else besides her lucky beau.

We wish them the happiest of marriages!

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

Summer so far...

5/31/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

Moving into my new complex was probably the best decision I've ever made. My life is absolutely wonderful in every aspect. Expect the man department; which is just confusing. Let's recap.

The men in my life:

First there's Sweater Guy (we dated last semester). He doesn't really wear sweaters any more. Which is fine. Since he's just as attractive wearing t-shirts. We text from time to time. Arrangements were made for us to longboarding on Friday, but the thought of being with him alone seemed tortuous. Like pushing a bruise on purpose. So I decided to cancel because it might rain. That and I didn't do anything I might regret, like proclaim how much I like him, and that I we should get married(what? where did that come from?). But, being the glutton for punishment that I am, I hung out with him yesterday. Until 1 in the morning. I thought I was over him for sure.... I guess not. I had the best conversation I've ever had with him last night. Why is it so much easier to talk to him now that we're not dating? If you're thinking it might be a bad idea for me to date him again, you would be right. But I can't help myself in times such as these.

Then there's the Best Friend. My personal Mr. Kinghtley, whom I swore I was in love with in my last post. I should probably go over a little bit of our history. We met in a language class two years ago. We ended up on the same study abroad last fall semester. And we've had a least once class together since my sophomore year. And we're in the same major. So for the past two years, I've seen him more days then I haven't.
the Best Friend has been there for me through a lot. He was there when Mr. Advice Dear Jane'd me whilst on our study abroad. When Sweater Guy dumped me this last semester, he immediately came over and held me while I cried. He brought over sparkling cider when I moved into my new place. He let me borrow his car last week. Today he texted me and asked me what section of TMA 102 I was in so he could try and get in. And then I find we're already taking another class together! Oh, and I'm TAing a class of his this summer term. I cannot escape him even if I wanted to! We should be dating right? Nope. I just found out shortly after the last post he just started to date someone in his ward. Gah! We are ridiculously perfect for each other. My past boyfriends have always been jealous of him. But whenever I've tried to flirt or bring up the topic of us dating, I feel like he totally shuts me down. So, I stopped trying. But we text at least every other day. And the other day, after I told him I owed him a home made desert for letting me borrow his car, he tells me he'd rather go out for shakes or something so we can hang out and talk rather than the alternative. To the guy readers out there: What is the Best Friend's deal? I'm thoroughly confused!!

There's a few guys in my ward that I would date for sure. But no one really sticks out very much. And most of them seem to be interested in my roomie anyway. So nothing here.

So to sum up:
Sweater Guy is insanely attractive, but only interested in me as a longboarding buddy probably.
I have no idea what the Best Friend wants with me. A better grade in his class this summer maybe?
And I'm still single, but hopeful...


Until next time
xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

"It is not meet for Man to be alone... "

5/17/2010 The Romantic 1 Comments

Most of us dread high council Sunday as it is, but when the topic is dating and marriage, I found myself wanting to bolt for the door!

The guy from our ward spoke wasn't too bad. He made the usual, "I think the bishop gave me this topic because he wants everyone to know I'm single" jokes. (ha... ha...) But I couldn't take him seriously. Why? It's not that he's a bad guy. Or that the talk didn't keep the audience captivated. It was the fact that I think he might be a vampire.

Ok. I know he's not a vampire. But when my roomies were giving me the skinny on everyone in the ward, one of them said she doesn't trust him because he has shifty vampire eyes. Meaning, sometimes his irises are all black, and we think he might thirst for our blood. (Sound familiar?)

So when he took to the pulpit, I just burst into a fit of giggles because he's a vampire! And who takes dating advice from vampires seriously these days. I'm sorry Cullen kid, but I think I'll be wearing turtle necks around you from now on.


Oh, and on a lesser note, I think I might be in love with my best guy friend... or deep like. * sigh* Advice?
xoxo
-The Romantic

1 comments:

What we've all been wating for!

5/11/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments



Maybe this is my problem. I haven't been recording my dating experiences in this book!

Let's take a look at some of the testimonials.

To sum up in a word “So I went out with this guy last night…” it would be, Enlivening!

In a world where the influence of music, movies, fashion and social acceptance is prevalent, I find this Dating Journal to be a real golden nugget of treasure. I love that every point is ‘food for thought’. The Snapshots are so fun and absolutely give us girls permission for introspection and provides opportunity for clarity of thought.

It’s an enjoyable and stimulating way to help us embrace this stage of life no matter what our age! ‘So I went out with this guy last night…’ assists us in discovering who we are and what we want out of life.

As a parent of dating teenagers and this is a ‘must have’ for my girls. As one who is experiencing the dating world again, this is a ‘must have’ for me too!

- Ingrid Vennik

I so wish I had one of these when I was growing up. I dated so many dolts and some great guys...I just didn't see the difference. A lot of heartache could have been passed by.

- Shanna Kwiatek


That's it, I'm heading to the book store tomorrow and buying one for myself!


Not...

Although, this snapshot does look somewhat familiar to a date I've been on. Only instead of Chinese food, it was the Malt Shoppe. But the texting... yeah, I've been there.

xoxo
-The Romantic

ps. there is a guy in my ward with dreamy eyes who might just have some potential. i'll keep you updated

0 comments:

GUMBY

4/27/2010 the heart breaker 1 Comments

After a long history of dating boys who turned out to be complete jerks….
I had a friend who decided to set me up with a guy she “knew” (also known as just met him in the library and realized he was a nerd)

I agree reluctantly to go on a date with Gumby (his name is AMAZING… but Gumby will have to do). He rings my doorbell, I answer, Gumby is about 6.3 wearing a top hat and a suit… I’m wearing jeans and flip flops… awkward??? Yes…
Now first dates usually include, dinner or movie or chatting or bowling…. all of these are GREAT first date options…
Gumby chooses to set a romantic table for us two ALONE in his apartment. This table is decorated to the brim, flowers, candles, nicely set place settings, oh and I can not forget to mention the romantic playlist that was serenading me in the background. (please picture this WHOLE situation in your mind… 6.3 redhead, in a suit, bow tie, top hat, romantic dinner for 2)
I thought that would be the end of the surprises for the night. He now proceeds to turn off the music, and stand 3 feet away from me,I was terrified for what was coming next..nothing could have prepared me..Gumby is a trained opera singer and he sang, or belted, to me! Now, in moments that I feel extremely uncomfortable I tend to look at other people around me to gauge their reactions to the awkwardness of the situation but…. NO ONE WAS THERE… I clapped at the end of his performance and to be honest the rest of that date was a complete blur.

Upon my return home, after chatting with my roommates and laughing about the experience I had just had, I went to my room and checked my email… One email grabbed my attention immediately, GUMBY in large bold letters. He sent me an email with a song he had just recorded for me, he claimed this was the first song he thought of and wanted to sing when he met me.
I love Gumby… I love the story I have to share thanks to him… I really hope that Gumby finds some girl who loves opera, bow ties, top hats and romantic dinners on the first date. I feel bad he got stuck on a date with me to be honest. But my friends definitely opened my eyes to the opposite end of the spectrum… no more jerks for me… but no more Gumby’s either..

xoxo The Heart Breaker

1 comments:

Prospects

4/27/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

I had one room mate who said you can't really get over someone until there's someone else to move on to.

So in order to move on from Sweater Guy, I need a new crush. And maybe not even a crush, I'd settle for even a crinkle right now. Good plan right?

Problem is, I'm a little bit eccentric. I know this. It's ok. It's a fact I've come to love and accept about myself...

And the guys in my new ward... well, they're not. They all seem to cookie cutter versions of each other wearing different versions of the same shirt from aeropostle, AE, and abercombie.

Give me a boy with slightly skinnies and a band tee any day.
Why am I such a sucker for the Willoughbys?

I will try to keep an open mind though. Perhaps I will be able to educate some poor lad on the finer points of indie music and russian lit. And maybe he can teach me a thing or two as well.

things will work out.


xoxo
-The Romantic

0 comments:

:0(

4/23/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

Change is good right?

Goodbyes are sad....

But unfortunately necessary when you're stuck on someone who doesn't reciprocate your same feelings.

I tried telling Sweater Guy goodbye forever, because the whole friends thing isn't working out too well on my end.

It didn't work.... So I tried saying goodbye for a week(he's going to be around for spring/summer, and so am I). And then, my hands took control and decided to text him today.... I just had really good news I wanted to share!

Plus I still have his skate board.... oops....

xoxo
-The Romantic

0 comments:

A Symphony of Sound

4/19/2010 The Virgin 1 Comments

LB made me a CD for driving home and the long plane ride abroad.

What am I gonna do with this boy?

xoxo
The Virgin

1 comments:

Finals Week Dilemmas

4/18/2010 The Virgin 4 Comments

I met Library Boy in the library. (So original, right?) But not officially. He helped me find books for a paper last year. Occasionally I would see him and think about how cute he looked in his little A's hat. But that was it.

Then came last Wednesday. I met him at a BBQ. Saturday he asked me to hang out... Seriously some of the best conversations I've had with a boy in a really long time.

So what happens when you really hit it off with someone and you're leaving in three days, leaving the country in eight days, and the lad graduates this summer?

The Virgin

4 comments:

Bytheway

4/12/2010 The Romantic 0 Comments

Last night, for the first time in my entire life, some random gentleman asked for my number....

It was awkward and highly embarrassing. Let me explain:

My roomie and I were sitting patiently in the de Jong last night waiting for the John Bytheway fireside to start. We were catching up on all the couple gossip in our ward, discussing my man hiatus, and her upcoming nuptials. Things were swell. We were hoping the fireside wouldn't be on marriage, although that's what our stake seems to be pushing big time these days. When suddenly, the guy behind me leans over, sticks out his hand, and says, "Hi, I'm Jared (not really his name)! What's yours?" "Um, Camie (that's not really my name, of course)..." "My friend wants to go on a date with you. Can I get your number?" I turned bright RED. Um, no. First of all, I don't even know you, or your friend. You could be a total creeper and all I know is your name. Second of all, why doesn't your friend ask me himself. Third of all, who is your friend anyway?? As all these thoughts ran through my head I looked beseechingly at my roomie for help. She just shrugged her shoulders at me, as if to say, i don't know what you should do.
"Would you rather talk to him?" he asked. I gave the affirmative. But before he turned back to his friend, he asked how old I was. "20" I answered. He said, "oh." and gave a look that seemed to say, that's a little young. I'm a junior in college! Thank you very much. Quite old indeed! Sorry you're 25 and not married (his friend looked closer to 30). Jared leaned back to conference with his friend. Before he could lean back over and accost me anymore, the fireside started.
Thankfully, the fireside was on hope, not dating. But then again, it did give me hope for dating. haha. so, maybe this hiatus won't last that long at all. I visited my new complex last night. and everyone was just so dang happy! Someone was blowing bubbles from the upper balcony, people were laughing, and talking, and every person I walked by said hello. It was like stepping into the Emerald City of apartment complexes. I'm just hoping the wicked witch won't ever show up.

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

Rumour has it

4/04/2010 bekah 0 Comments

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelll, I was hoping that after not hearing from Jean Claude for two days that I would be in the free and clear.

nope

he called my roomie's boyfriend to set up something this week.

he could be asking another girl right?

it's not that he's a bad guy.... it's just that i'm a fawn right now... and i'm also extremely picky....

xoxo
-the Romantic

0 comments:

Oui?

4/03/2010 bekah 1 Comments

I am mildly freaking out.


My room mate/best friend, who is now engaged and luckily done with the awkward dating scene, once described her dating-soul animal as a fawn. Which means that she was skittish around men if they came to close. Too much attention, and she would bolt!

I'm not exactly sure what my soul animal is, but after last night, I'm feeling pretty fawn-ish.

I had a few ideas about who the date might be with. And my top guess was correct.
Enter in Jean-Claude.

Jean-Claude is a legitimate African. Who speaks French. And who has lived in Paris.
Oh, excuse me Jean-Claude, would you like to whisper sweet french nothings in my ear? Because I'd certainly be ok with that.

It was a simple double date. We grabbed some Little Ceaser's, headed back to our apartment, ate said pizza and some delicious ice cream, and then decorated easter eggs.

I'm not really sure how I feel about him. The date was ok. We talked about baguettes and cheese, gelatto, and Europe (which I miss dearly, did I mention that's where I was last semester?).

But here's where I freaked out.
I got the vibe. Do you know the vibe I'm talking about girls?
He's attracted to me, I can tell. But if he comes on too strong, I might just pull a Bambi and bolt myself.
We were done decorating eggs, it had been a few hours, and I had friends coming in from Rexburg. But he wouldn't leave. And I was ready for the date to be over. But I guess he wasn't. Thank goodness he had to run back to campus to finish a finance project (did I mention he's in the Business school?). But then he wanted to come back and watch a movie! at like 12!

Calm down buddy! I can only handle so much.
I told him my friends were in town, and that I'd already planned on visiting with them last night.
Reality: I drove to SLC with them for a huge Tongan party.

Too much attention just freaked me out. Slow down Jean-Claude.... SLOW DOWN! Let's just be friends for now... s'il vous plaît?

xoxo
-The Romantic

1 comments:

Curiosity Killed the Cat

3/31/2010 bekah 7 Comments

I am dying. Really, the anticipation just might kill me.

Blind date. Friday night. With someone in my ward.

My roomie and her boyfriend are setting me up. And they absolutely will not tell me who it is. No matter how much I threaten them. All my room mate will tell me is that I will be in a huge debt of gratitude to her later once I find out who it is.

I'm usually fine with blind dates if I can get the guy's name first to do some skilled facebook stalking. But not knowing is KILLING me!!!!!

So dear readers, what say ye about blind dates?

xoxo
-the Romantic

7 comments:

Memories Light the Corners of My Mind

3/30/2010 The Virgin 1 Comments

As a wee senior in high school I vividly remember my expectations of BYU.

They were high.

Whenever I told anyone that I was going to BYU, they always told me that I was going to date so much when I was there. I honestly thought I was going to have to whack boys off with a stick and I wouldn't be able to handle all of them. My dear seminary teacher overheard me talking about this with The Coquette, and she told us that that wasn't necessarily the case. I brushed away her comments. I was certain that I was going to be a dating machine.

But guess who was right...

Until this past semester (which has been the strangest anomaly), I could literally count the dates I had been on at BYU on one hand.

There are some girls, like The Heartbreaker, who just walk in the light. They get asked out all the time, and heaven knows they need the sticks. And then there are the rest of us, who just get invited to mass hangouts and the occasional date with that guy in your Bio 100 lab that gives you those creepy looks. And we all say yes because that is the polite, nice thing to do.

So... to the incoming freshman, BYU is not like your parents remember. Dating has seemingly gone out of style like the card catalog at the HBLL. (Wow. I just aged myself 15 years...)

Loves,
V

1 comments:

On a more serious note

3/29/2010 bekah 1 Comments

It makes me very happy that most of our readers think our blog is funny. I'm glad people relate to all the crazy dating experiences we've had. Some may question why it is we only post our negative experiences. The blog is titled the Anti-Austen after all. In a world where the pressure to get married is so great, sometimes it's just easier to tell about our funny/horrific experiences. I've been in some amazing relationships that haven't worked out for one reason or another.

So, dear readers, would you like to hear a sappy story for a change? It may not be as funny. But it's almost as good as P&P as far as epic love stories go.

Sometimes I worry that my standards are too high, through no fault of Jane Austen's.



Let's rewind the clocks almost a year ago. I was trying to get over a boy (as the story usual goes). I'd been his friend-girl; the substitute girlfriend, while his "real" girlfriend was attending the another university. He messed me up pretty good.But I was moving along ok. The one person who really helped me through it all was Mr. Advice.
Mr. Advice was a bit of a hippie. Despite this fact, everyone I knew absolutely loved him. He was the guy we all went to for advice(hence the name).
School let out, and Mr. Advice and I spent more and more time together. I was 19, and he was 25. Quite the age difference. He took care of me, looked out for me, gave me advice. But at the same time, he knew my potential, and what I was capable of. This is important for our male readers! So take note! I'm about to reveal a huge secret: Women want to be taken care of, but at the same time, they want the men they are dating to recognize the powerful abilities that they have to do almost anything.

I never understood before what it was like to talk to someone for hours and never run out of things to say. But he and I were like that. And we weren't even dating! We were just friends. I would stay out at all hours of the night just talking to him on the bench outside our apartment.
Pretty soon I realized that he had feelings for me. I could see it in the way he looked at me. Do you know this look dear reader? It is my most sincere hope that everyone know what it feels like to be looked at like this. Of course there was admiration and respect in his eyes. But there was this awe. He seemed so amazed sometimes just to be in my presence. And it wasn't like I ever did anything extraordinary. He would just look at me like that when I laughed, or said something silly. Or got mad. He looked at me that way all the time.
I was leaving in the Fall for a study abroad, and I figured nothing would happen between the two of us until the end of the summer, with the thought of my leaving him as a catalyst for any action he might take. But no. Things moved much more quickly than I ever expected.

Mr. Advice lived 45 minutes away. I expressly forbade him from driving down to see me anymore that weekend because I knew he couldn't afford it. But after church, I was sitting outside on the phone, and he came marching up the staircase of my complex.
He immediately ordered me off of the phone and told me we were to go for a walk. We barely made it around the corner of my complex before he said we'd gone far enough. And he collapsed on a shady patch of grass right next to the building.

He was so nervous and seemed absolutely petrified. I was worried someone died. I asked him if he was ok. Now I know he was just terrified for what he was about to say.

"I like you. I really like you. It's incredible actually." This is an actual quote that he said. How's that for an epic declaration? The rest is paraphrasing, but more or less what he said.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I'm sorry I didn't put my arm around you that night we went to the movies. I'm sorry I didn't put my arm around you that night we hiked the Y and you were cold. You're amazing. And I thought when we went to Salt Lake that all we would talk about that day was that other guy. But we didn't. And I like that fact that people thought we were dating, and that they called you my "girl" and neither of us corrected them. And I don't care if you don't like me. But I just had to tell you. I couldn't be around you and hold it in anymore."
He poured out his soul to me for about five minutes. I just sat there, shocked. I knew he liked me, but I had no idea such an ardent declaration of his affection was coming any time soon. I somehow squeaked out a simple, "I like you too" after he was done. There was no passionate kiss that followed. Or even a warm embrace. He simply put his arm around me, and we held hands for the rest of the afternoon.
And so began the best summer of my life.

So what happened with me and Mr. Advice? Well, reader, if you've stuck with me this far, I'm sorry to disappoint, but I'm afraid that's much too personal to divulge.
That's why we write our funny stories on this blog. Because sometimes the good stories are still too personal to re-live.
I'm over Mr. Advice now. He's engaged to be married. Congratulations to the both of them. I'm happy he's happy. We turned out not to be right for each other. But with such a standard as my first boyfriend, it's going to be very difficult to expect anything less from any other man. And it's not any fault of Jane's.

I've come to the conclusion that happy stories are good to post sometimes. Stay tuned readers. I might just post the exciting story of my first kiss sometime.

xoxo
-The Romantic

1 comments:

I'm Not That Pessimistic

3/29/2010 The Virgin 0 Comments

Sometimes there are good dates.

In this vast pool, sometimes you pick the good fish.

Good, simple dates sometimes aren't that fun to talk about. You girls know it. There's no drama. We live off drama.

The date with the Super RM was a good date. I knew him. He knew me. We'd hung out a few times. He wasn't creepy when he asked me. It wasn't a big production, because it doesn't have to be.

We went to Borders. We got hot chocolate. We talked, and I helped him look for a book to help him with his new job.

Short and sweet. Perfect first date.

He was sweet and fun, and he didn't try anything or try too hard. I don't ask for much. All I want is for you to listen to me when I talk. Look me in the eyes. Bring something to the table. I'm not going to put in the effort if you're not.

The Virgin

0 comments:

You Could Be a Model for Puppy Chow

3/24/2010 The Virgin 0 Comments

I met Bandanna Boy at concert for a local band. I was interested in his friend, not him. So when I went up to talk to the kid I assumed that the friend would come up and join our conversation just as he had at Muse. I was mistaken. After a gracious compliment about my dimples, Bandanna Boy asked for my number. "Why not?" I thought. The kid was nice, and maybe something could happen, but only if he took off that ridiculous bandanna that made him look more like an Australian shepherd than a Mr. Willoughby. We exchanged digits and that was the end of the night.

He called me a week later (and asked if I remembered him... Um... I got your number too, so yeah, I remember you. This is Provo for goodness sakes, I wasn't inebriated.) A date was set up for later the next week.

As far as dates go it wasn't horrid, but I wasn't interested in going out with this kid again. Here's why:
1. Fido bandanna tied securely around his neck. It reminds me of that creepy story you would tell as a kid about the girl with the ribbon around her neck.
2. Felt some need to impress me constantly. Please do not brag about the $8,000  water purifier your parents installed in your home. If there is anything Austen readers adore and swoon over it is a modest man.
3. I could not get a word in with this kid. Sometimes I like to talk too, and I may actually have something worthwhile to contribute to the conversation.
4. Don't ask me how much I weigh. Seriously. Your mother would be ashamed.

Experiences like this make me wonder what goes in the heads of the male sex that would lead us to think this is appealing.
Kisses,
The Virgin

0 comments:

Mr Confidence

3/23/2010 the heart breaker 1 Comments

So to begin I suppose we will start with one of my favorite first date stories.

This takes place my first year living in Provo, I was young, naïve, and well, excited about the idea of dating “mature college boys” ( now being a little more experienced I have come to the realization that that statement is indeed, an oxymoron. Boys NEVER grow up.) I meet Mister Confidence in my American heritage lab. He was handsome, charming and well, when you notice the 4 other girls in the class drooling over him as well you are reaffirmed in your conviction that yes, he is indeed, the cute boy of the class (ladies, you can not deny you are aware of who that is in every class you attend).

The Meeting:

The next class period I was honored that Mr. Confidence sat right next to me… my heart skips a few beats…. my cheeks quickly turn pink . He asks me a question about the class I answer politely and after quite a bit of small talk he asks me out on a date. I was thrilled.

The Date:

California Pizza Kitchen was the place.

Menus are delivered to the table, he decides we are going to play a game. I love games, I love spontaneity, so far so good. Then he tells me we are going to choose dinners for each other so we have to give a few rules of things we like or don’t like. I tell him I don’t really like meat that much, and I love salads without a lot of dressing ( I thought I was pretty darn specific) . He tells me he loves pasta and chicken and white sauce. (he was specific enough). The waitress comes, I order him, pasta with white sauce and chicken, it was really really difficult making that decision (sarcasm). He orders for me… are you ready? A Thai chicken Pizza??? Really??

For rest of our WONDERFUL meal, I learned all about Mr. Confidence, his likes his dislikes, his family, and more than I ever cared to know about his HIGH SCHOOL football career. I think I may have interjected a grand total of 20 words throughout dinner. (Note to the men of Provo, DO NOT tell us about your high school glory days)

Post Dinner:

A stroll through University Mall, he tries to hold my hand: BIG no no.

1st date: Don’t hold my hand ESPECIALLY in Public

He calls me hunny: I am NOT your hunny, nor will I ever be your hunny after this date. I explain I am really tired and have a lot of studying to get done.

The goodbye:

He walks me to my car (oh yes, I drove myself, he said he hates trying to follow directions when he doesn’t know where he’s going so I should drive myself??)

I unlock the car a few times to give him the hint I’m ready to leave, I’m done listening, and what does he do, goes in for the kiss, my back against my car door, I turn my head and he hits half lip half face, I was not prepared for this.

Post Date:

Here is my favorite part of the Mr. Confidence story.

Most guys realize when dates don’t go that well. But Mr. Confidence is a very special breed of men here in Provo. He thought it went wonderfully. I show up in class, hide in the back praying he’s already in there. He’s not. The seats fill up quickly around me. He comes in, tells the guy sitting in front of me that I am his girl and he wants to sit by me. Loser in front happily moves. He turns around,” hey baby, how has your day been?” I freeze, and then say, “lets talk after class.” Now, I am as non-confrontational as it gets, UNTIL it comes to idiot boys with MASSIVE egos.

The Talk:

I tell him after class that I had a great time on the date,

BUT I am not looking for a relationship right now

And I am sure there are many other girls out there who would love to date him and he will find them

(okay a slight lie to protect his ego)

He says:

Are you seriously rejecting me right now?

I ask:

Have you never had anyone turn you down before?

Him:

No

THE END.

I beg you Mr. Darcy, if you are living in Provo, please come find me because my search is wearing me out!

Thanks,

The Heart Breaker

1 comments:

The Friend Zone

3/23/2010 bekah 0 Comments

Being the delightfully sweet and thoughtful person that I am, I somehow always seem to end up in the friend zone.

I can't tell you how many texts I've gotten that say:

You are the greatest! Thanks for everything you do, and just being you! :0)


Really guys? I keep hoping that one of them will pull a Mr. Knightley, where he's secretly in love with me, and then finally realizes it. And then confesses said undying love.

But alas, I'm stuck in the friend zone.

When I got a text this semester from one of these male friends that said, "I want to talk", I was secretly hopeful. Instead, he called later that night to talk about reasons why I should serve a mission.
(insert deep sigh full of meaning here)
Maybe some day.
xoxo
-The Romantic

0 comments:

You Never Know What You're Gonna Get

3/23/2010 The Girl Next Door 0 Comments

Here's a good date for you. Ghosting. I bet you're confused as to what that is. I definitely was. Let me give you some background first.


It was the first day of class, so naturally I scan the classroom to see if I know anyone. Nope. So I proceed to sit in the back left corner. Safe and comfortable. The teacher begins to tell us that we will be doing group work all throughout the semester, so we need to make groups. But I don't know anyone! Great. I awkwardly ask the kids in front of me if I can be in their group. They seem nice...dorky, but hopefully good students. We do introductions and of the three girls in our group, I'm the only single one. There are two boys. One is really cute, but short. The other one is really white, skinny and awkward. Let's call the skinny kid, "The Creep". The Creep starts asking questions about me and is shocked that I am a junior, 20 years old and NOT married. He asks me whats wrong with me. Really? Who is this kid anyways?


Throughout the semester we get to know each other a little better. I get more comfortable with him...as does he with me. He tells me that he has to flirt with me because I am the only single girl. He tells me he likes my hair because it looks like I "just woke up or just got done doing the dirty dirty".


One day, he comes into class and says that he wants to take me out. This puts me on the spot, and so I agree. He won't tell me what we are going to do but just tells me the day and time. He comes and picks me up at my apartment and it turns out the other couple is in my ward...I've never seen them before. Ha, my bad. We proceed to go up to campus...yes, a date on campus. Bowling? A play? No. Ghosting. Ghosting is when you walk behind random strangers, as close as you can for as long as you can with out them noticing. We make it a competition. Now this would be funny just randomly with your friends, but on a date is a whole other story. Of course, The Creep has his camera to document this whole ghosting experience.


After ghosting for about an hour, we go to Dairy Queen. He takes more pictures with me. Just me and him. Ahhhh. The other couple is weird, of course, it's BYU. I end up just sitting at the table, day dreaming and wondering what my friends are doing.


Finally, it's time to go home. He just drops me off at the stairs with the other couple and drives away. Thank you. An hour later, I get a text from him saying the pictures and videos are up on Facebook. Already?!! Gosh. Thank goodness I don't have to go out with him again.


The next class period he tells me that I have "a lot of junk in the trunk" and he likes it. Wait, I just spent an hour with him watching me walk and videotaping it. GROSS. Oh! And a couple nights later I get a text from him that says: Booty call?


Who does this kid think he is? Brad Pitt??


He definitely tried to ask me out again. I guess he had it in his head that I was interested. Once again, I'm too nice for my own good.


~The Girl Next Door

0 comments:

As Per Request

3/22/2010 The Virgin 4 Comments

I had my own plans for the evening. I was going to see Sherlock Holmes with my roommate and her cousin, The Super RM. However, the film did not start until later that night and I was left to myself, alone in the apartment. Rather than work on my papers and pretend to be thoroughly interested in the basketball game. I decided to have a little fun and text Mr. Suds. After typical texting banter, he inquired after my plans for the evening. I informed him of my "very exciting" dollar theater plans. To which he replied that perhaps we could do something "fun" after. I had an idea of what that meant...

The movie ended up being a quote unquote date. The Man Hater opted out and wrote her paper instead. I was thus able to enjoy a somewhat awkward cuddle sesh with the SRM, who has been home for a mere three weeks.

Upon rushing home, I saw SRM to his car and ran up to my apartment. After a quick consultation with the girls, I sent Mr. Suds a text telling him I was home. He asked if I would like to come over. Psh yeah. A skype date/fashion show ensued with the Heart Breaker and the Coquette. With not a minute to spare Mr. Suds was there to pick me up.

He and I spooned on the couch while watching a movie. It ended and we stayed there for a bit. Somehow we ended up on the Lovesack. The next few seconds are a complete blur, he grabbed my face and started kissing me. I was thrown into the deep end. No amount of mental preparation could have helped me. Somehow I had to figure out a way to fumble my way through a make out. After moments of awkwardness, I was finally was able to hold my own as well as one could in my situation. It was a mere 20 minutes, but being the stickler I am for bedtimes, I adamantly told him that I should probably go home.

He dropped me off and there were excited phone calls and texts with emotions similar to that of a birth of a child.

And I did receive the obligatory text the day afterward....

Ciao lovelies,
The Virgin

4 comments:

An Addendum Is Now Needed

3/21/2010 The Virgin 1 Comments

After an awkward beginning, the Virgin is virgin lipped no more.

Yes, after years of horrible persecution by my well meaning friends, I have finally locked lips in my third year of college.

All in all, I'd say it went pretty well, but being a classy woman after Austen's own taste, that is the only detail I'm going to give...

- The Virgin

1 comments:

Words of Jane Austen

3/20/2010 bekah 2 Comments

In a letter to her sister Cassandra:

"There was a scarcity of men in general, and still greater scarcity of any that were good for much."

I fear that this will be my dismal and concurring view of Provo once I finally leave.

xoxo
-The Romantic

2 comments:

A trip to the store

2/22/2010 bekah 0 Comments

There are some moments where my life is so completely the exact opposite of a jane austen novel, it's ridiculous. Case in point: today, where I ran into my ex at the grocery store. (insert gasps of shocked horror here)

Provo is just much much much too small at times. Why can't there be more than two grocery stores in this city??

I had a premonition that i would see him today. I almost never go shopping during the day. I'm too busy. And lo and behold, when I walked in, he was there! All I needed was quarters for laundry, and milk! I booked it as fast as I could to the milk at the back of the store, and the booked it to the next open register. But of course, the cashier didn't have any rolls of quarters. I had to take a ten dollar bill and exchange it at the service desk. And who was checking out at the register right next to the service desk??? Yes, you guessed it.

I saw him, but quickly pretended like I didn't. Of course, it was an old woman working the service counter and it seemed to take an eternity for her to notice I was there.

And then it happened just as she handed me the roll, "Were you gonna say hi?" he asks.

Um, no. I wasn't. I thought the text telling me you never wanted me to contact you again was a pretty big indicator that I shouldn't say hi if i were to see you.

We chatted. It was awkward! It ended with a bizarre handshake as I trudged my way home in the bitter cold of this forsaken state.

Good thing I'm dating someone new. And he is a non-hippie, who showers, and doesn't live with his mother...

It's a wonder I still hold out any hope for a Mr. Darcy to come save me in this poor provincial town....

Affectionately yours,
The Romantic

0 comments:

Periodicals

2/20/2010 Megan 0 Comments

It was my freshman year at BYU and I was still naive to many of the social "norms" of the campus.

Like the fact that studying in the periodicals section of the library meant you wanted to be hit on...

I was experimenting with different places in the library to find where I liked to study the most. I decided that I liked the periodical section because of the big windows. So that is where I started studying.

It was nearing midterms and I also had a paper to write, so I backed my bag and headed up to the library. I set myself down at an empty table in the periodical section and began studying. After I'd been there about an hour a boy came over and sat down at my table. Usually when someone sits at the same table as you, they sit in the chair diagonal to you. My new friend pulls out that chair, hesitates a second, puts his bag down, and then sits right across from me. I continued to study, not thinking too much about it. He pulled out one book and started studying. After about an hour he started looking around and not paying too much attention to his reading. Two hours after he'd sat down he says to me, "hey are you going to be here a while longer?" Yes... "Could you watch my stuff for a few minutes?" Sure...
He left, came back, didn't study very much, and sat there for another two hours. After I had been there for five hours, and him for four, I started to pack up my things. He looked up at me and said, "Are you leaving now?" Yes...
And he closed the same book he'd been 'studying' the past four hours and stood up. He walked out with me, starting some small talk. The normal questions were asked along with him commenting on how long I can study...haha. Little did he know when he walked in that he chose a girl who was going to sit there for four hours. If he had known that maybe he would have brought more than one book...

Then the question came, "Hey, I was wondering if you'd want to go on a date with me this weekend. My roommates and I have this date planned..." I thought it was only fair to warn him of my age so I responded with, "Yeah, sure. But just so you know, I am a freshman..."

I went on the date and it ended up being fun. I've seen this friend many times on campus since and we wave hello.

I now study in places other than periodicals. Unless I'm way desperate for a date that weekend...(the last sentence is meant to be read with sarcasm)

Peace out,
The Homemaker

0 comments:

A Little Lacking in the Chemistry Department

2/18/2010 bekah 0 Comments

As the romantic one in the group, I sometimes have picky taste when it comes to men. My Mr. Darcy should be tall dark and handsome. Probably an English major, with impeccable taste in clothing. And he should have gone somewhere really exotic on his mission, like Russia.

Enter Mr. Physics. He is about 115 pounds. Around my height. Wears coke bottle glasses. And studies physics. What could we possibly have in common? Absolutely nothing. Which is why it was quite the shock when he asked me out last summer.

Now, before I sound too judgmental, you must understand dear readers, that I really do give every guy a chance. But this guy didn't really seem to want one. So pay attention boys; his mistakes were unfortunately common ones.

First of all, we went to a movie. A movie on a first date is a bad idea for a few reasons. It's pricey. Not creative at all. And you can't talk and get to know your date. Mr. Physics tops it off by asking me what I think about movies as first dates as we are walking to the WILK. I was put in a little bit of an awkward position. How should I respond? "A movie as a first date is detestable!" No, that wouldn't be very nice. I shrugged it off with some neutral answer.

The actual date part in and of itself was fine. Nothing spectacular. We filled the non-movie moments with small talk about families and his mission(always the perfect topic when you have nothing to say. The guys will go off on this foooooreeeeeeevvvvvveeeerrrrrr). I was unsure of why he had asked me out in the first place though. Because he didn't seem to be asking any questions, or all that interested in what I had to say. Here's another tip boys: Don't ask a girl out you're not interested in spending time with just to fill the dating quota the bishop has given you. It makes her feel used.

The walk home was the worst. I'd run out of questions. And he'd run out of mission stories. Poor Mr. Physics never really had a chance, but I was making an effort! The topper was the door step scene. Because there wasn't one! Mr. Physics didn't even have the decency to walk me to my door. We just sort of went our separate ways at soon as we back to our apartment complex... Not exactly the Willoughby manners every girl hopes for (even if he was a bad boy, we all want one).

Later, I'm back in the ward. I'm sitting outside the bishop's office waiting for an interview. And as the ward clerk, he was there as well. He mentioned how he'd heard before our date that I'd said I would never date a science major. And that's why he hadn't really tried. Really Mr. Physics? Why would you say that A, and B, you totally proved my point about science majors.... Socially, their principles of buoyancy are a little off.

0 comments:

Bad Dates Start Early

2/16/2010 Rachel 0 Comments

So. This date is from high school. And while this exposé is dedicated to dating at BYU, I will say that this is by far my worst date, even when compared to all of the crummy ones that I have had in all my years attending university.

Let us start at the beginning, shall we?

Mr. Can O Cheese Whiz developed a little crush on me on a stake youth activity. When senior year started, the fates put us in a class together. He parked his toosh in the desk right next to mine. Over the course of the year, he kept pestering me to go out with him. I never flat out denied him, but I was not going to arrange the dreaded thing. Finally, he asked me for reals in the spring. To his surprise I insisted we double with mutual friends. To my surprise, he was surprised that I would suggest such a thing. I also insisted that we see Pride rather than this kiddy movie he wanted to see.

Flash forward to that Friday. He picks me and everyone else up. We get to the movie theater and and stand around for five minutes in the cold waiting for him to walk and go get tickets. "This is ridiculous," I think, and walk up towards the counter. Boy H buys tickets for my friend H, then it's Can O Cheese Whiz's turn. He buys one ticket. So then I get mine, ever grateful that I brought my wallet. Burgers for dinner. Once again... I paid for myself. When we walk into the theater who happens to be there but my kid sister and my best friend. Perfect. We sat directly below them.

The movie ended. Thus proceeded the awkward drive home. I had this terrible looming image in my head of him attempting to kiss me at my front door with my mom and sisters peering through the window as I shove him off me. I was quickly awakened from this nightmare. We were nearing my street. He stops in front of my house. "Oh gosh, oh gosh, oh gosh..." "Well I had fun tonight," he says. "Me too? See you Monday." I hop out of the car. My mind is reeling as I walk up to the door. Wait... This is it? You didn't walk me to my door and you didn't even put the car in park?

Perhaps even more than the date, I dreaded the next Monday when we had class. "Hey Miss. V." "Hey." (I attempt to become thoroughly interested in my notes, but I'm thwarted by his persistence in talking to me.) "I'm really sorry about Friday." "Oh, it's okay. It's really not a big deal," I reply. "I'd like to make it up to you, would you like to-". No way. No way. Let's recap the "date" shall we? I paid for my movie and I paid for my burger. I do believe the correct term is a glorified hang out. So no, you will not "make it up to me". You had your chance, bucko. But of course I didn't say those things, instead I replied in a very quiet, awkward tone. "Oh no, don't worry about it." And then my rotund English teacher waddled to the front of the room and began lecture.

Much love and a red face,
The Virgin

0 comments:

A Week of Bad Dates

2/15/2010 Rachel 0 Comments

We've all had that date that makes us want to groan.

Perhaps it started out well and ended badly, or perhaps you knew right from the start it was going to be a disaster.

Either way blush with us as we recount our worst date stories (thus far...).

0 comments:

Can I get a "Yes Please!"?

2/14/2010 bekah 1 Comments

"All I want in a man is someone who rides bravely, dances beautifully, sings with vigor, reads passionately, and whose taste agrees in every point with my own." -Sense & Sensibility

And I want him to look like this:


xoxo
-The Romantic

1 comments: